IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Many students take part time jobs while studying in university. Do you think it is a good or bad idea?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is irrefutable that the cost of tertiary
education
Use synonyms
 has become very high and
student
Suggestion
the student
have
Suggestion
has
 to
work
Use synonyms
part
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
 to fund their
education
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 situation has both positive and negative effects. In the following paragraphs,
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
 shall discuss the issue in depth. There are many reasons why working
part
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
 is beneficial while studying in university.
Firstly
Linking Words
, higher
education
Use synonyms
 is very costly and students need to do
part
Use synonyms
 in
time
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
 to fund their
education
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the habit of working hard right from early years makes students realise the dignity of labour and they are better placed in life later on. What is more, students do not indulge in any violence and crime and drugs.
This
Linking Words
 is because they
donot
Suggestion
do not
 have
time
Use synonyms
 for
such
Linking Words
 activities.
This
Linking Words
 is
also
Linking Words
 instils some discipline in their lives because they have to manage
time
Use synonyms
 efficiently so that there's
to
being one more than one
two
 studies do not suffer.
Finally
Linking Words
, while doing these jobs, the developer network of friends doing different courses and from diverse backgrounds. In conclusion, I believe that being pushed to hard
work
Use synonyms
 is a positive development.
However
Linking Words
, there should be a limit to
number
Suggestion
the number
 of hours students are allowed
part
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
,
otherwise
Linking Words
 studies will suffer.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: