Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional or religious festivals; during festival periods, people only want to enjoy themselves. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#people #festivals #periods

Some people argue that we no longer remember the original meaning of traditional and religious events.Back

then

Accept space

people's entertainments and having

fun

would be p

rimary

Suggestion

primarily

from their stand.I a

m totally agree

Suggestion

totally agree

that enjoyments s

eems

Suggestion

seem

to be p

riority

Suggestion

a priority

Accept space

however

, i

refers to the speaker or writer

do not agree people have forgotten what these f

eativals

a day or period of time set aside for feasting and celebration

festivals

mean.

Initially

, people are getting to have

fun

, purchasing gifts for their c

losests

a small room (or recess) or cabinet used for storage space

closets

and having delicious, rich dishes during festival

time

rather than practising their religion.They think it is only

time

for enjoyment.

For example

, the c

hristmas

a Christian holiday celebrating the birth of Christ; a quarter day in England, Wales, and Ireland

Christmas

day would be g

ood example

Suggestion

a good example

Accept space

here to prove my point.People who are living in the U

Suggestion

Accept space

look forward to c

hristmas festival.

Suggestion

the Christmas festival

Christmas festival

This

is because

Accept space

that

time

they have a big holidays and back

then

they tend to spend

time

with their immediate family and having

fun

.I mean they buy special souvenirs for their dears and socialize with their loyal friends and even o

rginise

being a member of or formed into a labor union

organised

organize

organized

a party to celebrate

this

festival.They mostly spend their

time

for that kind of activity throughout festivals.

However

, I a

m strongly disagree

Suggestion

strongly disagree

am strongly disagreeing

have strongly disagreed

with

this

as people had better to learn background of that f

estivals.

Suggestion

festival

This

might turn their perspectives and they start treating as original meanings of these festivals.In my opinion, religious festivals only mean people should practise their religions, hope quiet f

Suggestion

the world and long life for compatriots from g

the supernatural being conceived as the perfect and omnipotent and omniscient originator and ruler of the universe; the object of worship in monotheistic religions

God

rather than to have

fun

.The i

ndian

the end of a word (a suffix or inflectional ending or final morpheme)

ending

could be g

ood example,

Suggestion

a good example

the good example

here.Their h

ollywood

the film industry of the United States

Hollywood

festival is related to their religion and all i

ndian

a member of the race of people living in America when Europeans arrived

Indian

people tend to practise their religion at that

time

.It is a clear sign of maintaining these festivals real meanings. In conclusion,

although

, all celebration g

ive

Suggestion

gives

fun

time

for people, they should try to follow all rules of them and treat as their original meanings.

Tue Apr 07 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

287 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Commercialization
Globalization
Cultural dilution
Traditional values
Secularization
Festivity
Heritage
Individualism vs. collectivism
Consumer culture
Intangible cultural heritage

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Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional or religious festivals; during festival periods, people only want to enjoy themselves. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Fully explain your ideas

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You are visiting a town where you once worked. Write to a friend you worked with there. Include the following in your letter: •Tell your friend about your life now. •Give him/her details of your visit. •Arrange how you can meet.

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