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Band 5.5

In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development.

#students #university #study #country #opportunity #development
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Several decades ago the students were able to do University degree only in the
country
Use synonyms
 where they live. Due to
development
Suggestion
the development
 of international programs between the countries
now there
Accept comma addition
now, there
 are so many opportunities for the young people to continue their studying abroad.
Although
Linking Words
 studying abroad teaches the people to be independent by forcing them to make their own decision and broaden their horizon, it can
also
Linking Words
 lead to some negative impact of a new
country
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
discrimination
Use synonyms
. One of the main
benefit
Suggestion
benefits
 of living abroad as a student is gaining independence. New
country
Use synonyms
 forces people to learn and work on themselves. The students living in other countries start making their own decisions about spending their money and earning them.
In addition
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, by making new friends and learning new culture they build confidence which makes their personality stronger. In brief, studying abroad gives good opportunities to students to become more independent in life.
On the other hand
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, sometimes students can be exposed to
discrimination
Use synonyms
 by local people in foreign countries which definitely has a negative influence on student's psychology.
For example
Linking Words
, in France there are people who do treat niggers friendly. It has
detrimental effect
Suggestion
a detrimental effect
 on people's mental health, and if it is continued long enough, it can cause
such
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 dangerous consequences as mental illness or even suicide. People should be aware of
such
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 negative consequences of studying abroad as
discrimination
Use synonyms
. To conclude, to continue to
studying
Suggestion
study
be studied
 in a foreign
country
Use synonyms
 can be both beneficial and dangerous for students. There are plenty of chances to build a strong confidence and to be an independent person, but there are
also
Linking Words
 chances to be
face
Suggestion
facing
 difficulties
such
Linking Words
 as
discrimination
Use synonyms
.
However
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, to use or not any of those chances depends only on students themselves.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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