Many government think that economic progress is their most important goal. some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

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It is an undeniable fact that boosting the economic growth of a country is getting very popular nowadays. It is often argued by some folks that prioritizing those tasks that lead to the economic development of a region is more crucial. Meanwhile, other schools of thought still claim that focusing on other tasks
such
as environmental improvement and preventing cultural heritage are equally significant.
This
essay will explore both sides of the argument before presenting a logical opinion. On the one hand, supporters of the idea that encouraging economic evolution programs is the best way to improve citizen's lives. Providing facilities like high-quality education, advanced medical treatment and better places to live plays an important role in enhancing the economy of a state.
For instance
, countries like China and the United States focused on economic development to maintain their positions as a global power, leading to significant improvement in the quality of life of their individuals.
Thus
,
this
factor clearly expresses one side of the argument.
While
,
on the other hand
, advocates of the view that working on economic development tasks is not enough, there is a need for environmental stewardship. Environmental enhancement is crucial to ensure the sustainability of natural resources and addressing global issues
such
as climate change. To illustrate, countries like Sweden and Denmark prioritize their social welfare and environmental sustainability, which has led to a high level of happiness and well-being, even if their economies are not the largest in the world.
Hence
,
this
factor single-handedly elaborates the other side of the argument. As far as my opinion is concerned, I believe that economic advancement is undeniably important, and other forms of progress cannot be overlooked, which is why I am in favour of the second point of view because citizens' happiness leads to the success of a country.
To conclude
,
although
people have different opinions regarding the statement, I favour the second view as mental and physical well-being is much more important than economics.
Submitted by tsarfraz170 on

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general
Your essay is well-organized with clear paragraphs, but it could benefit from a more varied range of vocabulary and sentence structures to achieve a higher score.
task response
In the conclusion, reinforce your opinion slightly more by summarizing the main points discussed in the body paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure smooth transitions between ideas and paragraphs to improve the flow of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame your essay well.
task response
Relevant examples are used to support your points, making your arguments more persuasive.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • gross domestic product (GDP)
  • socio-economic development
  • quality of life
  • stakeholder
  • sustainable development
  • public sector
  • non-governmental organization (NGO)
  • civic engagement
  • green technology
  • quality of education
  • universal healthcare
  • cultural integrity
  • global competitiveness
  • human capital
  • innovation ecosystem
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