Children are now less active in their free time than in the past. Therefore, sports lessons must be compulsory in schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#children #time #sports #lessons #schools

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

In today’s world,

children

Use synonyms

are inactive and less energetic than they used to be in the past. It is believed that schools need to have some

sports

Use synonyms

classes for the youth. From my perspective, I totally agree with the statement and in

this

Linking Words

essay, I will give reasons.

Firstly

Linking Words

, physical activity improves

children

Use synonyms

’s mental well-being. Some

children

Use synonyms

are obese because of too little

exercises

Fix the agreement mistake

exercise

show examples

, and it’s not good for their health.

Therefore

Linking Words

sports

Use synonyms

lessons will make them do many activities to

sweating

Replace the word

sweat

show examples

and get fit. Not only

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

obese

children

Use synonyms

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

Linking Words

underweight ones need to more exercise to be healthier.

For instance

Linking Words

, my nephew used to be skinny, so my family decided to send him

into

Change preposition

show examples

a basketball class. Surprising that he is now in good condition and

also

Linking Words

gains

Wrong verb form

gained

show examples

muscles.

Additionally

Linking Words

sports

Use synonyms

help

children

Use synonyms

learn discipline and

working

Wrong verb form

work

show examples

with others as a team.

Sport

Fix the agreement mistake

Sports

show examples

is the best way that

teaches

Wrong verb form

teach

show examples

your kids some simple discipline like getting to practice on time, or doing the right techniques and rules in order not to be punished. Whenever

children

Use synonyms

join in their favourite sport, they will be more active and confident to show their skills and learn from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

others.

Moreover

Linking Words

, teamwork helps

children

Use synonyms

to be more united,

coordinate

Correct word choice

and coordinate

show examples

with team members to get scores. It is obviously seen that our kids will get more friends from

sports

Use synonyms

classes. That’s the reason why they become happier and more energetic.

To sum up

Linking Words

, I believe that

sports

Use synonyms

lessons must be obligatory in schools because of their benefits.

However

Linking Words

, there must be a variety of

sports

Use synonyms

for

children

Use synonyms

to choose their desired one, which

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

them joyfully take part in, not

Correct your spelling

too

show examples

axetily

Correct your spelling

acetic

Fri Apr 10 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

The essay shows a basic understanding of the topic, but it needs to provide a more nuanced response by considering both sides of the argument.

coherence cohesion

The introduction lacks a clear thesis statement, and the conclusion is abrupt. Ensure that each paragraph follows a clear and logical structure, and that the introduction and conclusion adequately frame the essay.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

280 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Some people think that mobile phones should be banned in public places like libraries, shop and on public transport, others argue that people should be free to use their mobiles wherever they like. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
There are differing opinions on whether mobile technology should be prohibited in communal environments. While some believe it is inappropriate to operate these gadgets in such settings, I argue that making a legal requirement for this behaviour is unnecessary.
5
band
Nowadays a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
These days, many people steer clear of visiting doctors and choose another ways for treatment.
6.5
band
The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree with this statement.
The most significant goal of science must be to have an impact on citizens' lives. I agree with this statement fully.
4.5
band
Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It is argued that staying in a nation that requires you to communicate in a foreign language might present both social and practical challenges. I completely agree with this notion as foreigners often experience problems such as soacial isolation, racism, and also segregation in playing games together.
4.5
band
In many countries teenagers are encouraged to do part-time jobs. What is the situation like in your country? What do you think are the advantages and disadvantages of doing part-time jobs?
Since life started, individuals have sought to live in an excellent environment, but they had no idea how this world would be formed . However, the crucial factors that lead to these conditions are the variety in culture, religion and morality as well as multiple languages. So , to reach this goal people must agree with the minimum criteria of common values and establish a global language.

Children are now less active in their free time than in the past. Therefore, sports lessons must be compulsory in schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people think that mobile phones should be banned in public places like libraries, shop and on public transport, others argue that people should be free to use their mobiles wherever they like. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree with this statement.

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In many countries teenagers are encouraged to do part-time jobs. What is the situation like in your country? What do you think are the advantages and disadvantages of doing part-time jobs?