IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Throughout history, male leaders have led us into violence and conflict. If a society is governed by female leaders it will be more peaceful. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion

#history #leaders #violence #conflict #society
In the modern world, the majority of the members of society come up with the idea that the female leaders are good managers in order to save a peace over the government.
However
, others hold an opinion that male leaders cannot be replaced by females. There is no denying that if the females take high positions, the ruling system of the country will be changed.
However
, many individuals do not believe that they can bring a peace to the government, because many wars and conflicts between the countries have happened because of women.
In other words
, many kinds in the middle ages have started wars because of women. A good illustration of
this
 is the film of Troy. In
this
 movie, a main character, a king of Troy, started a war because his wife slept with another king's son.
On the other hand
, some people tend to think that women are capable to bring a peace to the country.
This
 is because, they are gentle and they are not willing to hurt someone's feelings.
Accordingly
, if they run the country, they can avoid violences and conflicts.
For example
, several governments,
such
 as New Zeland and Croatia have been running with the female leader for a long time. Unsurprisingly, these years remain the most peaceful in the modern history of these countries. In conclusion,
although
 many people are keen to vote for women in order to reduce violence,
however
,
this
 method is not a viable option, because other people believe that the main causes of wars and conflicts were women in the middle ages.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: