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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people argue that teaching children of different abilities together benefits all of them. Others believe that intelligent children should be taught separately and given special treatment. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In recent years,
children
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 with different
abilities
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 and intelligence are more likely to be taught together in one classroom. People believe that teaching
children
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 of different
abilities
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 together is beneficial.
However
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, edgy people think that
children
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 who are intelligent should be divided from normal
children
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 and taught in another way with special treatment. Personally, I agree with the second opinion that they should be taught separately. For those kids who have high intelligence. They do more logical thinking, and they tend to have relatively better comprehensive
abilities
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. They may get bored with the knowledge
that is
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told
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given
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 by the teacher. Over time, they may lose interest in studying new things.
Therefore
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, it is beneficial to teach them more tough knowledge to prevent that from happening.
Furthermore
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, intelligent
children
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 relatively have low emotional quotient. They are more likely to be verbally and physically bullied because of their behaviour or even their high scores.
Therefore
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, it is essential to separate them from other kids to make sure they are studying in a nice atmosphere.
On the other hand
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, studying together without considering the
children
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’s
abilities
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 can cause passive effects.
Children
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 who are more sensitive and interested in arts but not doing a good job in writing, reading, and arithmetic may feel stressed. And
children
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 who are ADHD or have dyslexia do need special treatment.
Therefore
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, taking care of these
children
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 and separating them from the class would help a lot in their future studies. In a word,
children
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 who are intelligent should be separated and given enough treatment and it is not always beneficial to study in one classroom because some special situations exist.

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What works well

2
task achievement

You have successfully introduced the topic and presented a clear opinion in favor of teaching intelligent children separately.

coherence cohesion

Your essay presents clear and relevant points for both sides of the argument.

Improvement Suggestions

2
task achievement

While the essay addresses both sides of the argument, try to address the opposing view in more depth before stating your opinion. This would provide a more balanced discussion.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph flows logically to the next and that all ideas are well-connected. For example, use more connecting phrases and summarise the main points in your conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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