Some people believe that it is more important to teach children the literature of their own country than of other countries. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #children #literature #country #countries

Children should have books in their syllabus related to their state, and should not

taught

Suggestion

teach

about foreign books and articles. The essay disagrees with the statement, as to compete at international

level it

Accept comma addition

level, it

is necessary to read about their language and customs and by studying their literature, one can have an

opprtunity

a possibility due to a favorable combination of circumstances

opportunity

to build

career

Suggestion

a career

in these domains. People have a concept that their children should have knowledge only about their homeland. As we are living in a materialistic world and there is a great competition of skills and languages. So, if a

child

study books and articles in foreign language

Accept space

one can have

chance

Suggestion

a chance

the chance

to win competitions at global levels. A

child

should be familiar about happenings in surroundings, not only within a state but outside domain

also

, and should have knowledge about

rituals

Suggestion

the rituals

of overseas people so that to become successful and professional in

future

Suggestion

the future

Similarly

, when a

child

is providing

Suggestion

is provided

with the facility to learn languages of other people,

then

one can move to particular land for career building and becoming professional. As a

child

already know their

language it

Accept comma addition

language, it

is easy to get job

oppertunities

a possibility due to a favorable combination of circumstances

opportunities

Suggestion

these regions and new ways of knowledge for a

child

. In conclusion, mentors teach pupils about homeland

literature but

Accept comma addition

literature, but

foreign study material should be added to the curriculum so to make a

child

successful in

future

Suggestion

the future

and can find easy ways to become professional.

Submitted by shireengull70 on Sat Apr 11 2020

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

235 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that it is more important to teach children the literature of their own country than of other countries. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Nowadays many young people leave home at an early age and live in a city. Why do you think they move to cities? Do you think this has more advantages or disadvantages for young people?

To learn effecrively, children need to eat a healthy meal at school. How true is this statement? Whose responsibility is it to provide food for school children?

Some countries spend a lot of money preparing competitors in major sports competition such as Olympic Games and football World Cup etc. It is better to spend money encouraging children take up sports at a young age. To what extent do you agree or disagree?