In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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There are many tactics employed by commercial enterprises in the twenty-first century's competitive global market. Many exploit targeted advertisements suggesting their devices possess a more advanced feature that was not available before.

This

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technique can be aiming to improve their

sales

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performance and in my opinion, comprises an immense drawback for the citizens. On the one hand, businesses are keen to insist that their products have newly introduced characteristics in order to increase their

sales

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target and appeal to higher numbers of customers.

For example

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, every time Apple releases new versions of iPhones, brands them not only as containing updated gadgets but

also

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a few modern features.

Furthermore

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this

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commercial strategy results in a vast range of enthusiasm among people leading to tremendous marketing and

sales

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success for the company.

On the other hand

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this

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constitutes a negative business trend owing to several malicious ramifications in terms of the pecuniary well-being of the customers. Considering

this

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marketing policy, more and more consumers tend to spend their hard-earned financial resources and accumulated savings on upgraded versions of consumer goods,

for instance

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Moreover

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this

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is a tremendously hazardous phenomenon as it can bring about citizens taking loans with high interest rates, using up their credit cards to the ceiling or even risk going bankrupt or delinquent if they act heedlessly or fail to pay back on time. In conclusion, enterprises consider all sorts of advertising strategies

such

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as labelling their product as having new features to seduce people into purchasing them. I wholeheartedly regard it as an enormous negative development

due to

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the devastating financial repercussions for the ordinary people that are attached to

this

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sales

Use synonyms

policy.

sajjad.talebi2020Sun Aug 11 2024

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coherence cohesion

The introduction is clear and outlines the main areas of discussion. However, you can improve coherence by explicitly mentioning both the reasons why businesses highlight new features in their advertising and whether you consider this a positive or negative development.

task achievement

The ideas presented are clear, but they tend to be a bit generalized. Try to provide more specific examples and evidence to support your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Avoid using overly complex structures that may lead to awkward phrasing. Adding transitional phrases could help in improving the flow between sentences and paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

You have successfully included an introduction and a conclusion which help frame your essay well.

task achievement

The main points of your argument are adequately supported by examples.

coherence cohesion

Your views are expressed clearly, making your stance on the issue easy to understand.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5

6.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

6.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

6.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

275 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

emphasise
advertising
products
innovation
competitive strategy
consumer dissatisfaction
value

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In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Some people think that human needs for farmland, housing, and industry are more important than saving land for endangered animals. Do you agree or disagree with this point of view?

You recently went to see a good play at a theatre, but you did not enjoy it because of some problems in the theatre. Write a letter to the manager of the theatre. In your letter: say which play you saw and when describe the problems you experienced in the theatre suggest what the manager should do

Space travel to the Moon is often cited as one giant leap for mankind. Yet some people argue that this achievement made little differenct to our daily lives. What is your opinion?

The best way to reduce poverty in developing countries is by giving up to six years of education, so that they can at least read, write and use numbers. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Write a letter to your internet service provider to complain. In the letter: – Describe the problem and why you are unhappy – Arrange for an engineer to visit your home – Request a reduction in your bill