IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

With the increased global demand in oil and gas, undiscovered areas of the world should be opened up to access more resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#demand #oil #gas #areas #world #access #resources
The current population figures of the
world
 are quite worried some. The ever increasing birth rate of humans has put a lot of stress on the resources available in
this
world
. The increase in population has
also
 increased the demand for vehicles which in turn has made a global surge in the demand for
oil
 and gas. In
this
 essay, I will discuss about the about the harmful effects of discovering new areas of the
world
 to access more resources
such
 as
oil
 and gas.
Firstly
, lets discuss about the effects of crude
oil
 extraction from the seas and oceans on the marine life. Many countries in the
world
 like US, Russia and India are the major players when it comes to crude
oil
 extraction. Large equipments are installed in the water to extract
oil
 and
this
 is disturbing the habitat of sea animals. In the recent years, there have been numerous incidents of crude
oil
 leak causing death to millions of fish. To add
further
, not just these incidents, but only set-up of
oil
 companies in these areas is an attack on the nature and most sea animals are migrating to other areas because of threat to existence.
Secondly
, the increase in demand of
oil
 and gas has increased the air
pollution
 levels of almost all the countries which are there on the face of the earth. The vehicular emission is one of the primary reasons for the rise in air
pollution
 levels, which is
further
 impacting the nature by increase in temperature caused by ozone layer depletion. The humans face lot of health hazards because of
pollution
 caused by the motor vehicles.
For instance
, the main reason for people having respiratory issues and skin cancer is the rise of harmful chemicals in the air. To conclude, I feel
instead
 of discovering new areas and putting more pressure on the limited resources available in the
world
. We should look for innovation in the
oil
 sector and more efforts should be put in the creation natural gas.
For example
, CNG has been widely used in India now, which is cheap and free from
pollution
 as well.
Hence
, more
such
 measures need to be taken which could help in saving the environment.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • global demand
  • finite resources
  • energy consumption
  • exploiting
  • untouched ecosystems
  • carbon emissions
  • climate change
  • renewable energy
  • sustainable energy solutions
  • geopolitical consequences
  • territorial disputes
  • dependency
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