IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The line graph shows thefts per thousand vehicles in four countries between 1990 and 1999.

The line graph shows thefts per thousand vehicles in four countries between 1990 and 1999.
#line #thefts #thousand #vehicles #four #countries
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The line graph describes how many
cars
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 were stolen per
thousand
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vehicles
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 in Great
Britain
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, Sweden, France and
Canada
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 from 1990 to 1999.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 Great
Britain
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 had the largest number of
cars
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 stolen by thieves during the given period.
However
Linking Words
,
Canada
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 had the least number of thefts
Correct pronoun usage
that occurred
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occurred
Wrong verb form
occurring
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 over the same period. In 1990, approximately 17 thefts per
thousand
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vehicles
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 occurred in Great
Britain
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. The figures for Sweden
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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 around 8
cars
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 stolen per
thousand
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vehicles
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, which was followed by
Canada
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 and France, with roughly 1 difference.
According to
Linking Words
 the graph, the figure for Great
Britain
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 remained relatively stable, at around 16 theft per
thousand
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vehicles
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 in 1999.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the figure gradually increased to around 14 theft per
thousand
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vehicles
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 in 1999. People in France lost
round
Correct your spelling
around
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 7
cars
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 per
thousand
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vehicles
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 in the final year. The figure for
Canada
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also
Linking Words
 reached
at
Remove the preposition
apply
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roughly 7 per
thousand
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vehicles
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.
Submitted by kyunghea325 on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words cars, thousand, vehicles, britain, canada with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "roughly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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