IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Many people buy products that they do not really need and replace old products with new ones unnecessarily. Why do people buy things they do not really need? Do you think this is good thing?

#people #products #ones
In recent years, the role of brand new gadgets or consumer goods in everyone's life has become increasingly debatable. It has been contemplated by many individuals that people should stop purchasing irrelevant products or changing the old ones. In
this
 essay, I will highlight my opinion with pertinent examples and I tend to accord with the statement.
First
 and foremost, consumers are usually being triggered and tricked to replace old stuffs or acquire unnecessary goods, turning towards a frequent shopper.
That is
 to say, the power of marketing often nudges them in
such
 a way that they cannot remain in isolation, whereas someone around them might be buying or switching.
For instance
, there are a growing number of young people in urban areas who change their smartphones in every year because of the intuition to get ahead from everyone else. As a consequence, big corporations hold a negative power, which is irresistible, upon us. The most significant problem is that these buyers may squander their money on
such
 unnecessary items which would have a very little impact.
This
 means that they are not only giving away their hard-earned income to these astute marketers, but
also
 directing themselves towards an insecure future.
For example
, according to a Harvard University study in 2001, around 75% of South Asian nationalities do not own a safe and sound life after their retirement age because of their extravagant purchasing behaviour.
Furthermore
, they would not be able to be independent from the market even in the
next
 generation. To sum up, a number leading companies have the ability to tweak our willingness for buying or replacing products because of less control on our mental and spending behaviour, despite the significance these companies in our lifestyle. In my opinion, a very few consumers can shop in a supermarket with a shopping list for their gritty mindset and we should instill it as well.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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