Being a celebrity - such as a movie star or professional athlete - brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity has more benefits or drawbacks?
Nowadays with the advancement of mass media, talented
people
in many fields are widely known among Use synonyms
people
in all walks of life. They are Use synonyms
celebrities
and it is believed that being Use synonyms
public
Correct article usage
a public
figures
has pros and cons, but I think that the advantages do outweigh the disadvantages.
With regards to the drawbacks, famous Fix the agreement mistake
figure
people
have to sacrifice their private Use synonyms
life
for Fix the agreement mistake
lives
reputation
. Being distinguished means being the centre of attention and disturbed all the time. Correct pronoun usage
their reputation
Celebrities
have to act and behave properly whenever they are on Use synonyms
cameras
to protect Fix the agreement mistake
camera
images
as a minor mistake can destroy their career completely. Correct pronoun usage
their images
Therefore
, Linking Words
renown
Replace the word
renowned
people
can not live true to themselves. Use synonyms
Moreover
, they have to accept the fact of always being tracked by reporters whenever they are at home or outside, which is annoying.
Linking Words
However
, Linking Words
celebrities
who can overcome those disadvantages achieve a lot. Wherever they go they always receive admiration from their fans and are treated nobly. Use synonyms
For example
, every time a famous person appears in public there are always red carpet, reporters, cameras, luxurious cars, and lots of fans crazy about their idol. Another positive side to state is the financial benefit. Linking Words
Celebrities
earn a lot through their work or performances. Use synonyms
For instance
, Rafael Nadal, a talented and professional tennis player, Linking Words
gain
lots of money after a tournament. Now his possession is huge and he has a training centre for himself.
Correct subject-verb agreement
gains
To conclude
, being famous has many drawbacks, but the benefits are much more to consider. Linking Words
Celebrities
can not live a normal life, but they have the reputation, the possession and the success which are not easy to achieve.Use synonyms
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task response
Ensure that your reasons and examples directly support your argument. Provide specific instances where being a celebrity has more benefits than drawbacks. Also, consider presenting a balanced view by addressing potential benefits of a private life without fame.
coherence and cohesion
The essay shows a good logical flow and appropriate use of linking words. However, there is room for improvement in maintaining consistency in using pronouns and cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite