Some people think parents should supervise their children’s activities closely, while others believe children should have more freedom. Discuss

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In a little over a decade, the meaning of parenting for some people has changed the world over. While some people feel that parents should supervise the activities of their children, others think they should not. In my opinion, they should. Let us delve deeper into both the given schools of thought with my own perspective, in the subsequent paragraphs. On the one hand, it could be argued that children should be provided with a sense of
freedom
Use synonyms
.
First
Linking Words
and foremost,
this
Linking Words
is essential for children to grow into responsible adults. To elaborate, if parents provide total
freedom
Use synonyms
to their children, not only will they learn to think independently, but they will
also
Linking Words
perform their
day
Use synonyms
to
day
Use synonyms
tasks without help.
In addition
Linking Words
, providing young
ones
Suggestion
one's
freedom
Use synonyms
can help them to express themselves well.
In other words
Linking Words
, as children have the
freedom
Use synonyms
of thought, they will be able to live their life true to their beliefs. To cite an example, Dr. Sigmund Freud, the eminent psychoanalyst in his study
on
Suggestion
of
human behaviour and cognitive skills has asserted that children who had experienced more
freedom
Use synonyms
in their formative period could express their feelings better than the others.
However
Linking Words
, I side with those who believe that parents should always supervise their little ones. Primarily, by monitoring / watching over their activities, parents can keep track of their
day
Use synonyms
to
day
Use synonyms
life. To clarify, childhood is a formative period for children. If parents do not oversee / supervise their activities, their kids may fall into bad company.
Moreover
Linking Words
, supervising their young ones is a great way for parents to inculcate moral values in them. To substantiate, as children need love, affection and understanding, supervising them closely enables parents to develop these qualities in them.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, if parents look after their children’s activities, it will help to build intimate relations between them. To explicate, parents and children could understand each other’s feelings more because parents build a strong
relation
Suggestion
relationship
with children by offering their time to them. To illustrate, a survey conducted by UNICEF in 2018 in the US, on a group of 500 children, ranging between 8-15 years revealed that 85% of them showed
deeper relationship
Suggestion
a deeper relationship
with their parents who spent more time supervising their activities. To encapsulate,
although
Linking Words
it is undeniable that providing children with more
freedom
Use synonyms
helps them to express themselves better, parents can stop them from going astray by supervising them closely.
Therefore
Linking Words
, on balance, I believe that parents should monitor the activities of their children.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: