IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Some people say that technologies such as mobile phones are disrupting social interaction. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #technologies #phones #interaction
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Technological advancements in gadgets like cell phone devices have disturbed the true form of interaction. I completely agree with the statement because the bond between family and friends seem to weaken due to the advent of cellular. An authentic way of communication takes place only
then
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 when a group of people sits together to exchange ideas and thoughts. Needless to say people are lacking the skill of empathy just because it is impossible to empathetic on the call, it is evident that a close connection can never be built in phone.
For instance
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, a psychologically dejected and disturbed person will always seek a psychiatrist who could counsel him in person rather than looking for someone to take advice on the telephone.
That is
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 why these ubiquitous small machines cannot supersede humans.
Moreover
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, the verbal ability of the preceding generation is on the verge of being hampered, as mobile phones are mostly used for texting.
Furthermore
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, the youths nowadays are failing to forge a bond between parents and themselves. Reason being the inadvertent inclination towards these gadgets.
For example
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, if a teenager is sitting in a living room with the family members, he would definitely be found engaged to his phone
instead
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 of initiating a friendly conversation with his loved ones. In a nutshell, it is advocated that the expansion in the use of phones is detrimental to the human kind,
this
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 grave problem must be tackled, and it is imperative to take immediate action to curb it for the betterment of the human life.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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