IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

It has been argued that gift giving should not be encouraged, because money is often wasted on things that people do not like or want. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

#gift #money #people
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At various events a society has a tradition to give a
souvenir
;
however
, occasionally inappropriate because it is useless or people do not need these things.
Therefore
, the majority of people think necessarily change
this
 tradition and stop to give a
gift
, while others have the opposite view. Overall, I partly agree with the topic statement because we have different events and circumstances where people can predict things or have inevitable needs to give a
souvenir
.
Firstly
, few people can decline the fact that close circle of people alludes to you that they want, so you can buy a present without any doubt.
For example
, the close friend can demonstrate you some stuff that suits for him;
however
, he still does not buy it for different reasons.
Moreover
, people on some part of events inevitably give a present
such
 as women`s day when men present flowers and other gifts.
Consequently
, things as a
souvenir
 need in some circumstances and events.
Although
 the majority of occasions when people decided to buy something universal and cheaper it creates an awkward situation, thereby
this
 type of present should be discouraged via feedback from who accepted a
gift
.
For instance
, in my country, the tradition presents bed linen or pot flowers,
nevertheless
 on the chance of the allergy or uselessness
such
 stuff.
Besides
, if these things are useless, so after people can have many awkward moments too, because we usually ask about gifts
such
 as “the meaning of receiver”, or “why you are not using the
gift
?”
thereby
Suggestion
Thereby
 it could lead to controversial aftermath.
Thus
, if people do not have sureness on a present, perhaps better for evading of the embarrassing occasions and give money into a card or envelope, or only congratulate you. To conclude, I cannot wholeheartedly deny a present giving because occasionally you need to do it,
as a result
, better consider the type of a
gift
 or allude to people with the
souvenir
 that they want.
Submitted by ilua.cavchuk on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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