IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Many museum charges for admission while others are free. Do you think advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

#museum #charges #admission #people #museums
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In the recent times, many people are aware about the art
work
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.
This
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 will lead them to a visit to the
museum
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. Some museums are taking
money
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 for the entry which will be utilized in the management of it. There are a plethora of merits and few demerits of
this
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. The essay will discuss above notion with arguments in below paragraphs.
To begin
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 with, the predominant merit is that the
money
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 can be utilized to pay the salary of the employee of the
museum
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.
This
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 will be employed to take care of an important thing from the visitors.
Moreover
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,
this
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money
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 can
also
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 be utilized to organize the event.
Although
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, many people are visiting
this
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 place to explore their skills,
this
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 event can help them raise the awareness of their
work
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.
For example
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, many museums can organize the competition and declare the prize to the winner,
as a result
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, people were trying to attempt
this
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 type of
work
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.
On the other hand
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, there are few demerits of taking
money
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 for the entry of a
museum
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. The
first
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 demerit is that the
museum
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 will not contain the extraordinary
work
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 as per the visitant expectation.
As a result
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, they feel they spoiled their
money
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.
Furthermore
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, in the modernized world, the rate of
this
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 will increase drastically as well. Due to
this
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 many people are ignoring visit to a
such
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 place in spite of they are using the internet to see the
work
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.
For instance
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, people having low family budget never take their child to see
such
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 places. In conclusion, there are many advantages of collecting
money
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 in the form of entry fee compare to few disadvantages.
This
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money
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 can use to provide the service to the visitant and salary of employees who manage it.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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