Some parents believe that their children should do educational activities during their free time. Others say that in this way children are under pressure. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#parents #children #activities #time #pressure

The educational activities for students after

school

are more important

continues

Suggestion

continuing

to be a controversial topic. There are valid opinions on both sides, which I will discuss. On the one hand, some parents prefer their children to do educational activities after

school

because of the intense competition in the whole world.

For example

, they will plan numerous academic exercise and tutorial classes

Suggestion

for

their children to ensure they can get a high

rank

Suggestion

ranking

school

. Most of the

parent

Suggestion

parents

only concentrate on their children

school

exam result; they believe that more senior exam results equal to a better future.

Moreover

, some parent thinks that children always waste their leisure time

to play

Suggestion

playing

mobile or computer, doing educational activities can take advantage of time in the right way.

On the other hand

, some people think that

this

way will push children under pressure. Nowadays, the homework that

school

Suggestion

the school

give

Suggestion

gives

a student is already over-workload. An investigation shows that Hong Kong students spend an average of 2 hours a day to complete all their homework. Meanwhile, they need to go to

school

for 8 hours a day, which mean they need to spend 10 hours a day in the academic field. If the children need to do educational activities after

school

, it will give them immense pressure and bring out a negative effect to them.

Furthermore

, as the competition increase, academic result is not the only criteria to determine

student future

Suggestion

the student's future

student's future

. Society becomes

more focus

Suggestion

more focused

on various

development

Suggestion

developments

of the student.

Thus

, parents should not limit their children only can do educational activities. Overall, I feel that it may sometime do more harm than good to give many workloads to children. We should concentrate on their other development and it will more

favorable

encouraging or approving or pleasing

favourable

to their growth.

Mon Apr 27 2020

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Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

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Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

294 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some parents believe that their children should do educational activities during their free time. Others say that in this way children are under pressure. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

in some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can learn. opportunities.

In some countries, there is not enough recycling of waste materials (e.g. paper, glass, and cans). What are the reasons and what can be done to solve this problem?

Several people assert that the main cause of crime is an economically disadvantaged background. However, others say that crime is caused by a person's nature. Discuss both ideas and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that in order to give opportunities to new generation companies should encourage high level employess who are older than 55 to retire. Do you agree or disagree? Why.

Some people think that it is more important to spend money on roads and motorways than on public transport system such as railways and trams. To what extend do you agree or disagree?