Some parents believe that their children should do educational activities during their free time. Others say that in this way children are under pressure. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#parents #children #activities #time #pressure

The educational activities for students after

school

are more important continuing to be a controversial topic. There are valid opinions on both sides, which I will discuss. On the one hand, some parents prefer their children to do educational activities after

school

because of the intense competition in the whole world.

For example

, they will plan numerous academic exercise and tutorial classes for their children to ensure they can get a high ranking in

school

. Most of the parents only concentrate on their children's

school

exam results; they believe that more superior exam results equal to a better future.

Moreover

, some parent thinks that children always waste their leisure time to playing mobile or computer, doing educational activities can take advantage of time in the right way.

On the other hand

, some people think that

this

way will push children under pressure. Nowadays, the homework that

school

Suggestion

the school

gives a student is already over-workload. An investigation shows that Hong Kong students spend an average of 2 hours a day to complete all their homework. Meanwhile, they need to go to

school

for 8 hours a day, which means they need to spend 10 hours a day in the academic field. If the children need to do educational activities after

school

, it will give them immense pressure and bring out a negative effect to them.

Furthermore

, as the competition increase, the academic result is not the only criterion to determine the student's future. Society becomes more focused on various developments of the student.

Thus

, parents should not limit their children only can do educational activities. Overall, I feel that it may sometime do more harm than good to give many workloads to children. We should concentrate on their other development and it will more favourable to their growth.

Submitted by cheonglam320 on Mon Apr 27 2020

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

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Sentence 2 - Example
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Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

296 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some parents believe that their children should do educational activities during their free time. Others say that in this way children are under pressure. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Nowadays many people eat very badly in spite of the information which is available about ways to have a healthy, balanced diet. What could be the possible causes of this? Suggest some solutions which may improve the eating habits of the young.

Many people believe that restaurants give a suggested gratuity to their consumers in order to reduce the wage of the employers in the restaurant. To what extend do you agree or disagree and give your opinion. Write no less than 250 words

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The number of zoos in some countries has increased. Some people think they are cruel and should be banned. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say history is one of the most important subjects. Other people think that, in today's world , subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.