Children today are too dependent on computers and electronic entertainment. It would be better for them to be outside playing sports and taking part in more traditional pastimes than spending all day indoors.Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#children #computers #entertainment #sports #part #pastimes #indoors

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Children are the tender buds of the society and they are required to tag True values of life. In

this

Linking Words

present scenario, most of youngsters depend upon the modern gadgets and spend less

time

Use synonyms

on playing outdoor activities which is essential for their development and growth.So, I completely accorded with

this

Linking Words

statement. To embark on, there are multiple reasons that adolescence is more engaged in Indoor activities rather than outdoor activities.

Firstly

Linking Words

, the most indispensable reason is that children are busy

withtheir

Suggestion

with their

hectic schedule so that's why they have no enough

time

Use synonyms

to play with your friends. So that's why they spend more

time

Use synonyms

on their mobiles and computers. The adolescence has more burden of their studies so that's why they had not enough

time

Use synonyms

to play outdoors activities. Whereas, nowadays Technology is updated at an exponential rate as there is various kinds of different games which is very interested and children's are

also

Linking Words

more interested in playing that game they feel relax while playing

Linking Words

this games

Suggestion

this game

these games

. To illustrate, now-a-days teenagers spend most of

time

Use synonyms

in playing pub games which is the one of the famous and boy spend a lot of

time

Use synonyms

in playing it and wasting their

time

Use synonyms

and they not spend most of

time

Use synonyms

on studying.

Secondly

Linking Words

, there are various benefits while playing outdoor activities as by playing

Linking Words

this activities

Suggestion

these activities

this activity

the children cannot only improve their mental fitness as well as their physical fitness. Physical activities play a crucial role in the life of the students as they can

also

Linking Words

show their interest and talent in the sport field. To conclude, the parents should give attention towards children's that how much

time

Use synonyms

you should spend on indoor activities and outdoor activities, it is the responsibility of the parents to nurture their children's according to the requirements.

Submitted by evercool09 on Mon Apr 27 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

299 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

dependent
computers
electronic entertainment
outside
sports
traditional pastimes
excessive
negative impacts
physical health
mental health
promote
overall well-being
play outdoors
read books
socialize
develop
balance
holistic development

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advatnages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
We will start to taking about is this good message or not? maybe the family thinking when you will talk with your childern and said that for them they take a positive energy or maybe they and encourage them to try to do anything and find what they like to do.
4
band
In many cities, an increasing number of people do not know their neighbors and the sense of community is lost. Discuss the causes and give measures to turn it around.
Most metropolitan city, it is growing numerous people who are not known their bordering resident and then feeling of community is lost. There two main factors are the lifestyle and busy time. To overcome this address are, the first one is the government make social organization. The second is making lottery club.
6
band
Some peoole think that cities are the best place to live. Others prefer to live in countryside. Discuss both view and give your opinion.
Nowadays, there is a growing tendency for communities in urban areas to prefer to move to rural spaces. I personally agree with the view that living in the countryside will have its advantages.
5.5
band
(QG) In some cities public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegetables. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
There is an increasing number of public gardens for locals to grow their crops replacing public areas such as parks in many cities. This phenomenon has its own drawbacks in environmental problems and crime that can overshadow the benefit of having fresh food.
5
band
Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like Science and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Every school subject brings different knowledge, experience and skills to pupils. Some people argue that learning History should be the first and foremost fields at school. Others believe that in nowadays, on this quickly changed modern world there is another subjects, like Science and Technology which pupils should pay attention more than History.

Fully explain your ideas

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advatnages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

In many cities, an increasing number of people do not know their neighbors and the sense of community is lost. Discuss the causes and give measures to turn it around.

Some peoole think that cities are the best place to live. Others prefer to live in countryside. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

(QG) In some cities public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegetables. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?