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Band 5.5

Many high street shops have gone out of business in recent years.

#street #shops #business #years
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It is true that more and more high street shops have been disappeared. The development of Internet is the biggest reason of
this
 problem. In my point-view, it not only brings positive effects but
also
 negative ones. We
can not
can not
cannot
 deny the obvious benefits of shopping online. It is very
convinient
suited to your comfort or purpose or needs
convenient
. Where else you can comfortably
shop
 at midnight while in your pyjamas? You needn't to catch a bus or drive your car, needn't to get dressed.
Therefore
, the environment pollution will reduce and time will not be wasted.
Moreover
, shopping online provides us better prices. There are always many deals and lower-prices online because products are delivered to you direct from the manufacturers or sellers without involving middlemen. You can compare prices so it is easier for you to find the best deal.
Finally
, when
shop
 at home, you are not afraid of traffic accidents or robbers. It is actually much safer. The disappearance of high street shops
have
Suggestion
has
 many advantages.
Firstly
, it encourages retail companies to shift their business focus to catch up with technology development.
Secondly
, it offers more ways to
shop
 for customers.
On the other hand
,
this
 phenomenon
also
 has many negative effects. It leads to the reduction of employment opportunity so the unemployment rate will
raise
move upward
rise
.
Besides
, shopping
center
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centre
 is a place for people to hang out with their friends and family.
Thus
, its disappearance causes the fact that people have fewer point to go out and they become more and more closed.
Finally
, shopping online means people spend more time on their smart phone or computer. Phone addiction will increase while mental health will decrease. In conclusion, the disappearance of many
shop
 is both a good and
bad thing
Suggestion
a bad thing
.
Submitted by baokhangphamtrinh on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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