Theme: It is more important for schoolchildren to learn about local history than world history. To what extent to you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

It is argued that pupils should be more aware of their local

history

in comparison outside ones due to considering crucially. It is agreed that schoolchildren should completely be taught more about their native country’s background. Analysing both the earning money via knowing local

history

Accept comma addition

history, then

then

and patriotic feelings will highlight

this

Firstly

, If children learn their local

history deeply,

Suggestion

history, deeply

they can earn money because of it.

For example

, in the future, school learners may become workers as

touristic

guides and they can get profit for speech about local

history

during a

touristic

visited by throngs of tourists

touristy

trap. As a reason, mostly, foreign visitors to any country are interested in prehistoric places, monuments of the country. So, they will need a person who knows

local

Suggestion

the local history as well

the local history well

history

well.

Additionally

, not only pupils but

also

mature people need feelings about their homeland during their life span. The erudition of school children on local

history

may be a cause for above. When they study about historical periods of their motherland, after deeper approaching, the data about famous faces, their breakthroughs and work dedicated to the homeland will come

into

Suggestion

. In the aftermath, on encouraging, the hearts of

learners

Suggestion

the learners

will start beating towards patriotism more. In summary, schoolchildren can achieve more relying on knowledge local

history

Thus it

Accept comma addition

Thus, it's

Thus it's

clear that why there is dominance over world

history

of local one. After looking at standing points of the issue, we can aver that school curriculums should include more lessons of a country’s

history

than

world

Suggestion

the world

Submitted by dilfuz.yodgorova on Mon Apr 27 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

246 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
Pie Chart The amount of money that a children's charity located in the USA spent and received in one year, 2016.
The given pie charts bellow illustrate the proportions of generated income that was given to a children’s charity, which is located in the USA, and the expenses of the charity in one year. 2016.
7.5
band
At present, the media affects people’s lives significantly. What impact does this have on society? Is it a negative or positive development?
The media has a significant impact on the way people live their lives. This essay will discuss how the media shapes how people think about the world events, and I believe that this is a negative development because it endangers democracy.
7.5
band
Some people say that it is better to work for a large company than a small one. Do you agree or disagree?
On the job market, people who are searching for a job often look at corporations with big names. Due to a popular opinion that getting a position there is much better than in a small company. I disagree with that thought and in this essay, I will represent the ideas to support my point of view.
4.5
band
Some people think it is letter to travel by cars in the city. Other, however think traveling by bicycles is better. Discuss both views.
Transportation methods have been changing in recent years, as aresults of advanced technology, and increased awareness related to global warming. At that point, some people believe in the advantages of travelling by cars outweigh the advantages of cycking. This essay will explain the both perspectives, and highlight the importance of friendly environmental types og transportation methods.
7
band
Many people say the gap between rich and poor people is wider, as rich people become richer and poor people grow poorer. What problems could this situation cause? What measures can be done to address those problems?
These days, the space that is between the poor and the rich is increasing owing to the fact that the wealthy people's money is climbing, but the number of people who are in the poverty line is growing. This essay discusses the matters of this happening and how we can solve them.

Theme: It is more important for schoolchildren to learn about local history than world history. To what extent to you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Pie Chart The amount of money that a children's charity located in the USA spent and received in one year, 2016.

At present, the media affects people’s lives significantly. What impact does this have on society? Is it a negative or positive development?

Some people say that it is better to work for a large company than a small one. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think it is letter to travel by cars in the city. Other, however think traveling by bicycles is better. Discuss both views.

Many people say the gap between rich and poor people is wider, as rich people become richer and poor people grow poorer. What problems could this situation cause? What measures can be done to address those problems?