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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantageous of taking risks outweigh the disadvantageous?

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It is always argued that risk acceptance is one of the most important and crucial aspects of life in terms of
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
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 and society.
Although
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 there are numerous benefits involved in
this
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 notion, the drawbacks are by no means negligible. On the plus side, the advantages of taking
risks
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 are countless.
To begin
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 with, young people sometimes face some alternatives and they have to choose among their options. They know they are at the age where need to take a risk and it is for their better future. Many people believe taking
risks
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 will
cause
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improve
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 their development and put them in a better job opportunity and comfort zone. A salient example is that many individuals immigrate to another country and they assume there is more space for them.
Although
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 they might face several hardships after moving to another country, they learn new skills and new language
as well as
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 they can build their personality. On the negative side, taking
risks
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 always needs some challenges. At the same time, we can decrease them to a large extent after accurate risk assessment.
For example
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, my brother went to the US
last
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 year. He analysed the location, the university, the community, etc before going there.
Consequently
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, he chose to go to a small city that has a well-known university, as he believed it was the most rational option based on his personality and budget. Now, after one year, he is very successful and satisfied with his selection. In conclusion,
nevertheless
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, it is beneficial to take
risks
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, but we can not deny some disadvantages.
However
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, in my opinion, the good impacts of perfect decisions outweigh them.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear and logical structure. It is important to make sure that there is a clear progression of ideas from the introduction through to the conclusion, with each paragraph logically following from the one before.
coherence cohesion
Include an introduction and a conclusion that clearly address the essay prompt. Your introduction should present the topic of discussion and your thesis statement, while your conclusion should summarize the main points and restate your position in a clear manner.
coherence cohesion
Develop your main points with supporting details and examples. Each paragraph should focus on a single main point. Use specific examples and explanations to back up your ideas and to demonstrate your understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task. Make sure your essay fully responds to the prompt and that you present a clear argument. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of taking risks as outlined in the question, and provide a clear opinion on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
task achievement
Present clear and comprehensive ideas related to the topic. Make sure to expand on your ideas with sufficient detail to demonstrate your ability to discuss the topic in depth.
task achievement
Use relevant and specific examples to support your points. Make sure the examples you provide specifically relate to the topic and clearly illustrate your arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
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