Women are better at childcare than men therefore they should focus more on raising children and less on their working life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
modern world, it is observed by some politicians and health authorities that females are more capable of caring the necessity of children. In
this
Linking Words
context, it is advised that the mothers’ aim should be raising children
instead
Linking Words
of focusing on the career. I partially support
this
Linking Words
argument and
this
Linking Words
essay will highlight the key features of
this
Linking Words
statement.
First
Linking Words
of all, since the beginning of humanity, caring babies is under women’ responsibility.
Moreover
Linking Words
, due to gender equality in the work environment,
this
Linking Words
role has started to shift from women to men.
However
Linking Words
, the genetic background of men is based on hunting, which means “working” in the modern world, to care for the whole family.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, all babies have been fed with breast milk
first
Linking Words
2 years, because of that, it cements the bond between a mother and a baby,
also
Linking Words
it allows babies to listen only to their mothers.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, as per academic research published by WHO, it states that the children caring by only mothers are more successful throughout the educational life and
also
Linking Words
professional life.
That is
Linking Words
the solid reason why women’
first
Linking Words
preference should be raising a child
instead
Linking Words
of a career.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, in
this
Linking Words
contemporary world, the equality between genders has become a vital importance in order to increase efficiency and productivity in most of the industries.
In other words
Linking Words
, if only men involved in the business, the point of view of the process of the doing works always will maintain its position and it would avoid the improvement of innovation and profitability.
For instance
Linking Words
, if we focus on marketing sector, it could be clearly seen that women’s views and their selling strategies are unusual and accomplished. In spite of the fact that the majority of the
staffs
Suggestion
staff
in the marketing sector are men, the decision-makers are mainly women.
Also
Linking Words
, while half of the population is female, why should not they involve in a working environment? In conclusion, in the light of information given above, I agree that the women are entitled to
care
provide a cure for, make healthy again
cure
the child at least until children's school age, but
on the other hand
Linking Words
, it should not be forgotten that most of the developed countries’ prime minister are women and they have achieved significant achievements.
Submitted by oguzhancinar93 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender roles
  • nurturing
  • empathy
  • sensitivity
  • maternal instinct
  • paternal involvement
  • child's development
  • work-life balance
  • gender equality
What to do next:
Look at other essays: