IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

People continue to commit crimes even after being punished for it. Why do you think this happens? How can crime be stopped?

#people #crimes #crime
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Criminals commit crimes, even after serving their sentences. It would be caused by their education and not prepared for social
life
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. Novel solutions could train them while serving sentence in
prison
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 and check them frequently after released from goal. Prisoners commit crimes after being punished. Some people still not approve prisoners as a cell of the social fabric owing to their mistakes. The primary reason is criminals are not ready for the social
life
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 in some particular ways,
such
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 as they are not trained while serving their sentence in
prison
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. To be exemplified, according to recent research shows that trained prisoners a less likely to commit crime again. Another cause would be financial problems with them due to the fact that they could not find jobs for making a living after release. So that lead to find easy money by doing crimes. Crime could be stopped by some solutions.
Firstly
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, the government takes drastic measures in order to stop committing crimes again. If criminals educated in
prison
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, they could find a job.
For instance
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, by training
prison
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 inmates and giving them some skills as needed, it gives them a chance to live without criminal intention.
Secondly
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, to make sure people release from
prison
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 should check by polices. By doing
this
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, criminals will be in under control and their criminal intention could be lessened. In conclusion, people continue to commit crimes after they finish their sentence due to lack of education and social
life
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 training.
However
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, it could be prevented by doing some skill training and give them chance to integrate into social
life
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. Not only give them education, but
also
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 check them after being released
Submitted by pmonkhzaya22 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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