Many people think that money promotes happiness. To what degree do you agree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Money is considered by many to be one of the most important contributing factors towards
happiness
Use synonyms
. While I understand having material wealth could make one’s
life
Use synonyms
easier.
However
Linking Words
, there are
also
Linking Words
other factors that could bring joy and fulfilment. Money could increase
happiness
Use synonyms
when used to meet basic needs.(
and
Suggestion
And
health for people affected by poverty.) Money is a powerful universal tool that helps people access to health care, nutritious foods, and a home where people feel safe can improve mental and physical health and
thus
Linking Words
leading to increased
happiness
Use synonyms
.
Besides
Linking Words
, for wealthy people, money makes them have more control over their
life
Use synonyms
choices and have more freedom to say no to things they do not want to do. Being the boss of one’s own
life
Use synonyms
could bring a sense of security and satisfaction.
However
Linking Words
, there are other factors contributing to
happiness
Use synonyms
. Research shows that living a purposeful and meaningful
life
Use synonyms
makes people feel happy.
For example
Linking Words
, volunteers who work around-the-clock during the
coronavirus
relating to or characteristic of carnivores
carnivorous
pandemic to save lives may be rewarded with only a little money, but helping people and doing the job they are good at, brings
happiness
Use synonyms
and fulfilment.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it is believed by many that exercise could bring short-term
happiness
Use synonyms
. Exercise can release endorphins, which increase people’s feelings of
happiness
Use synonyms
, and it
also
Linking Words
helps people feel more confident or comfortable in one’s own skin. In conclusion, people could find
happiness
Use synonyms
in money to an extent, but beyond that, people could
also
Linking Words
find
happiness
Use synonyms
through other non-financial means,
such
Linking Words
as doing meaningful work or living a healthy lifestyle.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • subjective
  • universally
  • cultural differences
  • psychological factors
  • satisfaction with life
  • emotional balance
  • personal achievements
  • social connections
  • fulfilling relationships
  • sense of belonging
  • sense of purpose
  • physical health
  • well-being
  • financial stability
  • mindfulness
  • gratitude
  • positive thinking
What to do next:
Look at other essays: