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Writing Samples
Band 6

In many countries, traditional food is replaced by international fast food. This has adverse effect families, individuals and society. Do you agree or disagree?

#countries #food #effect #families #individuals #society
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It is comprehensively acknowledged that the availability of international foods has risen
significantly which
Accept comma addition
significantly, which
 causes many more people do not consume traditional foods. I firmly disagree because
this
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 is detrimental both for individuals who consume it and society in general. There are two primary reasons to support
this
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.
First
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 and foremost, it is an undeniable fact that consuming fast foods to excess results in serious health problems. Fast foods
such
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 as fried chickens, hamburgers, and chips- which incredibly high in salt and fat are responsible for
such
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 ailments as high blood pressure, high level of cholesterol, obesity even heart disease.
Further
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 and more importantly, some international
foods
Suggestion
food
 chain
deliberately attempt
Suggestion
deliberately attempts
 to attract children to shape their eating habits. One
particularly
Suggestion
particular
 example of
this
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 is the character of Ronald McDonalds. The bright clothes and smiles are clearly designed to attract kids who push their parents to take them to McDonald's restaurants. Having grown up eating in the restaurants, people are more likely to continue eating there throughout their adult lives. Another frequent criticism of consuming convenience foods is decreasing the value of local foods. Every region has its specific food
specialty
Suggestion
Specialty
. With the introduction of international foods and fast foods, they are more likely to disappear. In
this
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 way, the local communities will face
unfavorable
not encouraging or approving or pleasing
unfavourable
 impacts in terms of losing their traditional value. By way of conclusion, even though fast foods are preferable due to their relatively low cost and convenience, I once again reaffirm that they are deleterious for people’s lives.
In other words
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, they are beneficial in the short term, but the dangerous effects are predominant in later life.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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