IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Nowadays, many people spend less and less time at home. What are the causes of this? What are the effects of this on individuals and on society

#people #time #home #effects #individuals #society
Over recent years, human beings spend lesser
time
 at their dwellings. As humans are social animal, they prefer to spend
time
 out with colleagues or friends or get involved in face to face communications.
However
,
this
 leads to problems
such
 as stress and anxiety. Human is a social animal and he or she needs
interaction
 with others. The availability of online
interaction
 with technological advances does not satisfy those which have realized the importance of physical
interaction
. Researches suggest that online
interaction
 is not a solution in the sense of loneliness, but they
also
 have reported that people use social network sites to make friends who can be met in person.
In addition
, the high level of loneliness decreases when those who suffer from it escape from the
home
 surrounded by walls.
Therefore
, the duration of
time
 spent at
home
has
Suggestion
Has
 seen a decline. Lack of
time
 spent at
home
 comes with both personal and societal problems. Those who want to get rid of the sense of loneliness can have high-level stress and anxiety in crowded areas. Especially, noisy places may trigger anxiety in individuals.
In addition
, people who spend excessive
time
 out of
home
 exposure the higher level of pollution than those who do not and
this
 exposure leads to health issues like asthma, heart-related problems including bronchitis.
Moreover
, the increase in the number of people spending
time
 outside creates pollution problems because
this
 trend leads to noise, air, and environmental pollution. In conclusion, the people of today prefer to spend less
time
 at
home
as a result
 of the lack of
interaction
.The physical desire for physical
interaction
 is push people to go out of the borders of
home
 today. Althoughgoing outside and engaged in crowded activities looks like an effective solution to the satisfaction of that desire, spending excessive
time
 outside can likely cause stress-related problems and
also
 environmental problems
Submitted by pankaj_khubchandani on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: