The pie charts below show the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010.
The two pie charts illustrate the average expenses in a country
on
household categories in the years 1950 and 2010.
Change preposition
for
Overall
, at the beginning of the period, a significant share of total expenses was spent on housing, however
, in comparison, at the end
of the period the most amount of money was spent on food
category . Add an article
the food
Conversely
, the expenditure on health care constituted the least in both years.
With regard to housing, in 1950 it accounted for just under three-quarters of total expenditure, nevertheless
after over 6 decades the number experienced a more than threefold decrease to approximately a fifth, Add a comma
,nevertheless
however
, on the contrary
, food comprised only 11.2% in 1950 and experienced a large increase up to 34% in 2010. Likewise
, transportation
section composed only 3.3% at the beginning and rose to less than a fifth In 2010.
Correct article usage
the transportation
On the other hand
, over the period given health care constituted 2.4% of total expense
at the beginning and Fix the agreement mistake
expenses
this
number almost doubled to one in twenty, in 2010. Also
, it should be noted that education
category did not experience much of a difference over the years , only a mere 0.3% decrease from 6.6% to 6.3%
Another point that should be highlighted is that the amount of money spent on other items was roughly one in twenty at the start, Correct article usage
the education
nonetheless
in the second
year(2010) it rose to almost a fifth.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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