IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#countries #people #health #food #governments #tax
The line chart illustrates the rate of visitors at four Brighton landscapes in England. Overall, the number of people who
visit
 to
Pavilion
 was highest, while the proportion of visitors in Pier was lowest during the period shown.
Also
, there was
an increase the percentage
Suggestion
an increase in the percentage
 of tourists to
Pier
Suggestion
the Pier
, the reverse of the pattern was seen in the rest of
attractions
Suggestion
the attractions
. It is clear that in 1980 the rate of tourists in
Pavilion
 made up 24%, which was lower 6% than that of
Festival
Suggestion
the Festival
. In the following 15 years, while the number of visitors in
Pavilion
 increased
at
Suggestion
by
 49%, there was a
slightly
Suggestion
slight
 decrease in
Festival
Suggestion
the Festival
. Over the
next
 15 years, the figure for people who
visit
 in
Pavilion
 dropped significantly at 30%, whereas it was seen a go up about Festival about 28%. For Art Gallery and Pier category, people
visit
in
Suggestion
during
 Are Gallery was 21% in 1980, which was higher than that of Pier. By 1985, both the figures are
rose
Suggestion
rising
 slightly at 38% and 15%
respectively and
Accept comma addition
respectively, and
then
 they went about 3% over 5 years. From 1995 to 2010, while the proportion of people
visit
 in Art Gallery went down dramatically at around 9%, the rate for Pier went up
at
Suggestion
by
 21%.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: