IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Nowadays longer distances are travelled by people to work and study on a daily basis. Some consider it to be a negative development, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Introduction: No one doubts that having
good job
Suggestion
a good job
 or university has become a matter of concern to many people.
That is
Linking Words
 why the majority of people must be
gone
Suggestion
going
 to
workplace
Suggestion
a workplace
the workplace
 or studying at university far from their home, so do I, Mixed feelings have been offered
for
Suggestion
in
this
Linking Words
 issue.
This
Linking Words
 essay assesses these arguments. Body: On the one hand, so seriously has wasting
time
Use synonyms
 affected some people's lives that they believe long-distance is the most significant factor in decreasing yield in their lifestyle.
This
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 is best understood when it comes to spend their
time
Use synonyms
, and obviously there is a definite link between the level of losing
of
Suggestion
on
time
Use synonyms
 in traffic between several places and they can not to be achieved their goal in during a day.
In addition
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, it might be said that pollution can utterly be increased by using private cars which leads to having air pollution in
city
Suggestion
the city
cities
a city
, particularly in Tehran, when people have been
transporting
Suggestion
transported
 between the north and south of
city
Suggestion
the city
, it
will in result in
Suggestion
will result in
increasing air pollution rate
Suggestion
an increasing air pollution rate
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, people who oppose stopping
this
Linking Words
 way for living in
this
Linking Words
 cities specifically in
big city
Suggestion
a big city
big cities
the big city
, worry that there could be long-term dire consequences. They are concerned that if people are
worked
Suggestion
working
 in near of their home, the big cities would be face to many
problem
Suggestion
problems
,
for
Linking Words
example citizenship
Accept comma addition
example, citizenship
 in
this
Linking Words
cities
Suggestion
city
 can be lost their client and would eventually bankruptcy in their life.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, people have been going in long-distance enthusiasts feel that transporting between two long-distance is a part of an integrated system of increasing
using
Suggestion
use
 of public transporting, using their
time
Use synonyms
 with cell phone in
subway
Suggestion
the subway
a subway
 and reading self-development book in
this
Linking Words
 place
.
Accept space
.
This
Linking Words
 all helps to our cities and public transportation causes of using environmentally friendly energy. Conclusion: In conclusion, I personally tend to agree with negative impacts, as the most factor to
spending
Suggestion
spend
time
Use synonyms
,
this
Linking Words
 outweighs their possible advantages.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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