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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this affect local communities? How could this situation be improved?

#shops #supermarkets #area #affect #communities #situation
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Nowadays, many small grocers are in lockdown, according to the inability to eliminate the big supermarket.
Thus
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, it has caused significant issues for local communities. There are some reasons for
this
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 problem, namely the growth of unemployment rate and health impact. In my opinion, the local government should operate to control the damage.
To begin
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 with, the consequence of decreasing the number of local shops resulted in citizens losing their job,
This
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 situation forced the small store entrepreneurs to dismiss the former employees in order to conserve the expenditure.
Thus
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, the growth in the unemployment rate is not favourable for society. These quantities entitle taxpayers to reduce which affects the country economically.
Furthermore
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, since the market is fully controlled by supermarkets, monopolizing the price of goods will occur and civilians have to suffer from it.
Moreover
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, if people purchase the products from the supermarket, specifically grocery goods, it has instantly impacted the human body due to stale ingredients which most supermarkets can’t offer daily and include preservative substances. It leads to cancer and digestive problems if the population overdose on
this
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 substance. There are several methods to maintain small stores with the assistance of local governments.
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 of all, authorities should implement a tax scheme for companies with different incomes to balance the competition.
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, the governments can
also
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 encourage the banks to promote a special loan plan for local shops as long-term financial support so that supermarkets cannot easily eradicate the local stores. In conclusion,
although
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 the mentioned solution will help smaller stores still on the path, there are a lot of ways to solve
this
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 crisis. If local governments work overwhelmingly to formulate the equilibrium competitions, there will be fewer problems for city governments to deal with.
Submitted by bankniravong on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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