IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

#people #advertisements #products #lives
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The advertisements are the part and parcel of our daily
life
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,
although
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 it is a widespread belief that these advertisements make people unconsciously buy items that are
otherwise
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 not required.
However
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, there are proponents believing that these commercials provide information about new products that will benefit our lifestyle. I tend to agree with the former belief and would like to share my reasoning with
this
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 essay. There have been
a
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an
 explosion of inventions in
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last few decades
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the last few decades
 that have improved the
way
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 we live our
life
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. While many of those inventions have made our
living
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lives
 easier, there are others that are not critical or essential for a comfortable
life
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. These inventions are brought to the common man in
form
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the form
 of products that they hardly need.
For example
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, the fancy gym equipment at home. Advertisements are the
way
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 general public gets to know about these products. In most cases, these commercials exaggerate about the
products
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product's
product
 features. One can safely assume that about 9 in 10 advertisements
are
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am
 about products without which a common man can spend his
life
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 comfortably. These ads mislead the proponents to believe that they really need that particular
product
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 and make them spend their hard earned money. I would say these adverts are nothing but
cunning
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a cunning way
the cunning way
way
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 of making money.
On the other hand
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, there are some people who believe the advertisements are a necessary evil, as it is the only
way
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 the prospective users of a newly launched
product
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 can know about the
product
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. It is certainly a valid argument, but do we really need that
product
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? People have been able to comfortably spend their days without it so far. In the
end I
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end, I
 would reiterate my argument and say that the advertisement are only a gimmick of multi-national companies to sell their
product
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. They don't add any value to a people's lives.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • encourage
  • persuade
  • manipulative
  • unnecessary
  • excessive
  • artificial needs
  • desires
  • consumers
  • oversaturation
  • impulse buying
  • financial problems
  • inform
  • educate
  • features
  • benefits
  • innovations
  • raise awareness
  • social issues
  • positive behavior
  • enrich
  • well-being
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