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Some people think that we live in a society where money and possessions are given too much importance. Others believe that this is improving our lives. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #society #money #possessions #importance #lives
It is undeniable fact that showcasing our wealth and possessions have risen in popularity. Some believe that wealth and materialism
are given
Suggestion
are giving
give
 too much importance in our society, while others argue that
this
 trend can contribute to a positive progression in our lives. In
this
 essay, I will discuss both sides of the arguments, and show my support for the former view. On the one hand, those who believe the materialism and financial status should be given a high importance in a society, would argue that
this
 is a prominent factor that leads to a better
life
.
This
 is because it will create a sense of competition among
people which
Accept comma addition
people, which
 result in individuals putting more effort to succeed. By looking at
others's
Suggestion
others'
 financial status, one will thrive to achieve higher goals in
life
, and
this
 will give them motivation to set their bar higher.
On the other hand
, I believe that there are other aspects of
life
 that are far more important than wealth and money, and those should be appreciated even more. Putting high
emphasise
special importance or significance
emphasis
 on materialism, can take our attention away from other blessings we have in
life
,
for
instance our
Accept comma addition
instance, our
 health and enjoyable time with our loved ones.
In addition
, the society that measures values
by
Suggestion
of
 one's financial status, are less empathetic and helpful towards others. In conclusion,
although
 some believe that giving too much attention to the financial aspect can result in improving lives, I believe there are other areas that we need to emphasise more like our health and helping others.
Submitted by sohrabizadr.s on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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