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Writing Samples
Band 5

Many people buy products that they do not really need and replace old products with new ones unnecessarily. Why do people buy things they do not really need? Do you think this is a good thing?

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Many people are used to
buy
Suggestion
buying
 unimportant
stuffs
, which they do not really need and try to have the newer
stuffs
 in comparison with their old ones they already have. While there are some reasons why individuals buy goods they do not need, I believe that it is a harmful habit. There are some reasons why people usually buy
unnecessarily
Suggestion
unnecessary
stuffs
 in their life.
Firstly
, some people use some goods just because of the image of success and glamour associated
to
Suggestion
with
 the things and they want just to show-off with their
stuff
personnel who assist their superior in carrying out an assigned task
staff
,
therefore
 to feed their eternal greed, they would acquire many useless
stuffs
.
Secondly
, usually people have a boring life routine,
hence
 to alter
this
 routine and cheer up, they would go to shopping
center
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centre
 even if they are hard up.
Finally
, the aim of various advertisements is to subtly entice society to purchase products, which could be done by making unreal needs for them. From my viewpoint, above-mentioned habit has
detrimental effect
Suggestion
a detrimental effect
 on both individuals and society. Increasing consumerism would gradually vanish countries’ resources
in
Suggestion
on
 many aspects. The amount of wasted materials and money
are increasing
Suggestion
is increasing
 throughout a country, which could be utilized in ways that are more productive.
For instance
, people
instead
 of purchasing the newest model of a mobile phone, could spend their money on sport facilities. In conclusion, purchasing unimportant goods is increased among many people in countries. While some reasons are contributing to increase of consumerism within people, I believe that it is a damaging daily routine.
Submitted by shahrzaddehghanii on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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