IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Compare and contrast how young people in your country spend their free time nowadays to how their parents used to when they were young. You should write at least 250 words.

#contrast #people #country #time #parents
The definition of "free
time
" has been transformed as
time
 passes. The behaviour of our young generations in free
time
 is quite different from the adult generation because of the available services and stuffs. The purpose of
this
 essay compares the differences between young and adult.
First
 of all, one of the most common activities for parent generations is that doing sports or something like that exercise. According to the general survey, old children had superior physical abilities than recent children because they were doing sports a lot. What is more, as far as I know, almost all of them were likely to participate in at least one sport even though modern children have not a tendency. The other popular activity associated with child in the older generation is that reading books more than recent people. It is obvious that the publish industry is a downward trend, and the sales figure for books has been decreasing at an alarming rate. According to
this
, it can be guessed that modern children prefer electric books to paper books.
On the other hand
, virtually modern young people are keen on the video games. As technological advances, the many sorts of game machines were released, and the qualities of them have been increased more and more.
Therefore
, the growing number of people addicted to the variety of games. Another popular one is that sightseeing. As development of transport and tourism, people are easy to access to tourist destinations even foreign countries. The road infrastructure is developing and the trains connect to national scales. The fees are much cheaper than the old ones. In conclusion, what to do in free
time
 has been replaced due to the development of countries. There is no easy answer to which is better. I think modern children are easy to fulfil their appetites because they can gain almost everything, and they can do whatever they would like to.
However
, relying on technology probably exerts a harmful effect on their health.
Therefore
, it is clear that older children were healthier than recent children.
Submitted by ryotahand1006 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: