IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Modern technology is now very common in most work places. How do you think this has changed the way we work. Do you think there are disadvantages to relying too much on technology.

#technology #work #places
TECHNOLOGY HAS AN EMMENCE EFFECT ON HUMEN'S DAILY LIVING. ALMOST EVERYOFFICE HAS THE UPDATED SYSTEM OF THE TECHNOLOGY HAS
THIS
 MAY IMPACT THEIR PROFIT AND WORKABILITY OF THE WORKERS.
FIRSTLY
,
THIS
 ESSAY WOULD STATE THAT HOW TECHNOLOGY HAS ALTER THE WAY OF WORKING AND
SECONDLY
, THE MAJOR CONSEUENCE OF DEPENDING TOO MUCH ON IT. ON THE ONE SIDE, RENNOVATION OF THE TECHNOLOGY MADE EFFECTIVE CHANGES AMONG THE BUSINESS SECTORS. PRIMARILY, IT HAS BROADEN UP THE BUSINESS AROUND THE GLOBE WITH LESS WORKFORCE.
THIS
 HAS SAVED THE HUGE AMOUNT OF INVESTMENT THAT COULD NOW USE FOR THE DEVELOPMENT OF THE NATION.
FOR EXAMPLE
, AS PER THE UK UNIVERSITY REPORT, 80% OF THE NATION'S ECONOMY RUNS ON THE AMOUNT OF FINANCIAL HELP FORM AN ENTREPREUNERS.
ON THE OTHER HAND
, THE MAJOR DETRIMENTAL IMPACT OF THE TECHNOLOGY IS THE CRIMIAL ACTIVITY RATE. CRIMINALS FIND AN EASY WAY OF DOING FRAUDS THROUGH THE INTERNET
SUCH
 AS CYBER CRIMES. OWNING TO THE FACT THAT CYBER CRIMES ARE ONLY ACCESIBLE IF THE IDIVIDUAL HAS THE LATEST TECHNOLOGY TO ESCAPE FROM BEING CAUGHT.
FOR INSTANCE
, ACCORDING TO THE CANADA CRIME DEPARTMENT, THERE HAS BEEN SURGE IN THE CRIME RATES BECAUSE OF THE AVAILABILITY OF THE LATEST TECHNOLOGY. IN CONCLUSION, REVOLUTION IN GADJETS INDEED PROVIDE THE EASY AND STRESS FREE LIFE. BUT, HUMEN SHOULD HAVE THE PROPER KNOWLEDGE OF USING IT THAT WOULD DECREASE THE CHANCE OF VARIOUS CONS.
THIS
 COULD BE DONE BY ALLOTING THE PROPER INFORMATION BEFORE LAUNCHNG THE NEW GADJETS.
Submitted by drsefalipatel on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: