Some people think that the education system should only focus on preparing students for employment, while others believe it has other important functions. Discuss both sides and then give your own opinion.

#people #education #system #focus #students #employment #functions

Education is an indispensable part of human aspects. Some people believe education system need to give prominence to moulding student for their task while the other assumes it's has other necessary benefits as well.

This

essay will discuss on both sides and gives an evidence why learner study System should be given focus on improvements of their overall development rather than for their employment. To commence with, some people argue education of children should be managed according to their job tasks. If it happens, everyone will be employed and can conveniently spend their quality of lifestyle. They believe the course should be managed in

such

a way they will get work after their class.

For instance

, learner chooses health subject which is more notorious all over the world and will posses job in hospital after completion of course.

Hence

, the people are giving more priorities in a subject which bestows them job in future.

However

, other people argue learning should have another role as well rather than employment.

This

is because work is not everything which confers them quality of life. Even though they get the profession with high salary if they have no feeling of sympathy and the value of relationship, teaching will be futile. If there is love and care,

then

the life will be beautiful.

For instance

, a recent research concluded that 90% older people of the world are unhappy because of jobless but of dearth of love and affection from their children. So, the learning system must teach children about the crucial role of discipline, appreciation and respect. To conclude,

although

educations scheme focusing on business has advantages, in my opinion, learning systems should never give emphasis on hiring only, they should proffer value to other things like teaching discipline, about love and affection and so on.

Hence

, they can live their life happily with their family members without any stress.

Submitted by Sabu on Fri May 15 2020

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

315 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that the education system should only focus on preparing students for employment, while others believe it has other important functions. Discuss both sides and then give your own opinion.

Your opinion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that money is one of the most essential factors in promoting happiness. Do you think people can be happy without much money? What other factors contribute towards happiness?

In some developing countries it is difficult to recruit teachers to work in remote and rural areas and this can have a serious impact on education in these regions. Why do many teachers not want to work in these areas? What can be done to encourage teachers to take up posts in these regions?

Computers are being used more and more in education. Some people say this is a positive trend, while others argue that it leads to negative consequences. Discuss both sides of this argument and then give your own opinion.

Some people want governments to spend money looking for life on other planets. Others, however, think this is a waste of public money when there are so many problems on earth. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.