Young people today are better qualified than they were in the past. Some people argue that this is because competition for jobs is greater than it used to. Others say that people only continue their education because the opportunity exist for them to do so. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Higher
education
has expanded rapidly in recent years, and
this
is not likely to change in the near future. If employers continue to
demand
highly qualified graduates, more and more young people will choose higher
education
courses
.
Therefore
, the increasing
number
of higher
education
courses
is a result of higher
demand
from
students
and employers. In modern companies and businesses, technical expertise is one of the most important factors in choosing employees. If employees do not have suitable qualifications, they will not be able to produce goods and services of sufficient quality to satisfy the market.
Therefore
, it is extremely important that all employees are well-qualified, and have studied the technical demands of the business in depth.
For example
, the production of food requires a high level of safety, and
this
means that everyone involved in
this
process has to understand it in detail.
Furthermore
, the
number
of
students
in future
education
depends upon the
demand
from young people. If they are not interested in studying a particular subject at university, they will not apply.
For example
, the
number
of
students
studying business studies is very high and
this
is mainly
due to
the
demand
by employers for graduates.
On the other hand
, if
courses
were not provided by universities, it would not be possible for
students
to apply for them.
Therefore
, universities have adjusted to consumer
demand
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and created the
courses
that
students
want to study in order to attract more business and increase their own profits. The expansion of the
number
of
students
in higher
education
depends upon a
number
of factors, but the most important of these is the ability of graduates to find employment.
Consequently
, the
number
of places available, and employer
demand
, play an equally important role.
Submitted by 76805977 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion
Ensure that your introduction clearly presents the topic and outlines the structure of your essay. Moreover, a conclusion that summarizes the main points and clearly states your opinion is vital.
logical structure
Strengthen the logical structure by linking ideas more clearly. Use a variety of cohesive devices to help the ideas flow smoothly.
supported main points
Expand on your main points with more detailed explanations and relevant examples to support your arguments effectively.
complete response
Make sure to address all parts of the task. Discuss both views presented in the prompt thoroughly and present your own opinion more explicitly.
clear comprehensive ideas
Develop ideas comprehensively by providing thorough explanations and ensuring that each paragraph contributes to the overall argument of your essay.
relevant specific examples
Enrich your essay with more specific examples to illustrate your points. This will enhance the relevance and depth of your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: