Throughout the history, people dream to live in a perfect society while they haven’t agrees how the ideal society would be like. What is the most important element you think to make a perfect society? What do people do to achieve an ideal society

SInce
Correct your spelling
Since
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
earlier
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
, humans
expect
Wrong verb form
have expected
show examples
to enjoy a good neighbourhood
eventhough
Correct your spelling
even
,
the
Correct word choice
though the
show examples
expectations from an intact society
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
still not clear.
This
essay discusses
love
as an important element
to make
Change preposition
in making
show examples
a healthy environment and periodic social
gathering
Fix the agreement mistake
gatherings
show examples
as,
perfect
Add an article
the perfect
a perfect
show examples
way to get
people
along. Just like
people
living in a house are a family,
similarly
people
living around us should
also
be considered as a family. The only bond that holds together as a family is
love
,
hence
in order to accept neighbours there should be
feeling
Correct article usage
a feeling
show examples
of
love
and compassion amongst each other.
For instance
, when I am out of
station
Correct article usage
the station
show examples
due to
some work , it's the feeling of
love
and compassion that
neighbour
Correct pronoun usage
my neighbour
show examples
take
Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
show examples
care of my pet . Social gathering is an old ritual and a tried and tested approach
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
living together. There are always some traditions in each society which everyone should follow like having dinner parties once a month, gatherings
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
festivals etc.
This
helps
people
interact with each other and
hence
, develop a feeling of compassion for each other. A recent study has shown that societies which started having events every few days
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
have observed a reduction in complaints
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
40%.
To conclude
, everyone wants to live in
healthy
Add an article
the healthy
a healthy
show examples
and fulfilling environment and
people
Correct article usage
the people
show examples
living around you
plays
Correct subject-verb agreement
play
show examples
an important role in that. Though there is no definition of a perfect society,
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
people
can try to make it one by respecting and caring for each other and it can be easily achieved by having frequent meetings to mix up with each other.
Submitted by dahiyaannu.13 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Make sure to fully address all parts of the essay prompt to enhance task response.
coherence cohesion
Work on strengthening the connections between sentences and paragraphs to improve coherence and cohesion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: