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Band 6

Opinion Some people think that family members are more important than friends, what extend do you agree or disagree?

#people #members #friends
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The debate over whether family members are more crucial than
friends
 in
one
's
life
 has been a longstanding discourse.
While
 some staunchly assert the supremacy of family bonds, others contend that friendships hold equal or even greater significance. In my view, the relative importance of family is far greater, yet
friends
 play an important role as well in the
life
 of people. Family plays an undeniable and unique role in
one
's
life
. The bonds forged through shared experiences, genetics, and upbringing are often unparalleled. Family members are typically the first support system individuals encounter, providing love, care, and stability from an early age. The ties that bind families together can offer an unwavering sense of belonging and security, forming the cornerstone of a person's identity.
However
, it would be remiss to disregard the profound significance of friendships.
Friends
 are often the individuals we choose to be part of our lives, based on shared interests, values, and compatibility. Friendships can offer a level of companionship, understanding, and emotional support that complements, and in some cases surpasses, familial relationships. They provide an avenue for personal growth, exposure to diverse perspectives, and a safety net in times of need.
Furthermore
,
friends
 can act as a chosen family, particularly for those who may face strained or dysfunctional family dynamics. In
such
 cases,
friends
 become surrogate siblings, confidants, and sources of emotional sustenance. In conclusion, the debate between the primacy of family over
friends
, or vice versa, is ultimately a matter of individual perspective. Family and
friends
 each offer unique and valuable contributions to
one
's
life
. The importance of
one
 over the other can vary depending on personal experiences and circumstances. What is undeniable,
however
, is the intrinsic value of both family and
friends
 in nurturing personal growth, emotional well-being, and a fulfilling
life
.
Submitted by krajdeep916 on

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task achievement
To enhance Task Achievement, ensure that you address all parts of the task more fully. It is essential to provide a balanced view while articulating a clear position throughout the response. You could improve by integrating more specific examples to support your points, which would also help to clarify and expand your ideas.
coherence cohesion
For Coherence and Cohesion, the essay is well-structured with a clear introduction and conclusion, and logical progression of ideas. Improve the supported main points by linking them with more concrete examples or evidence. Also, consider varying your sentence structures and transitions to enhance the overall flow of ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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