Film stars and music celebrities may earn a great deal of money and live in luxurious surroundings, but many of them lead unhappy lives. Do you agree? To what extent is this the price they pay for being famous?

#film #stars #music #celebrities #money #surroundings #lives #price

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Celebrated personalities tend to

amaas

collect or gather

amass

amaze

amuse

Accept space

(

Accept space

(

Suggestion

degree of

disposible

free or available for use or disposition

disposable

income) or

(

Accept space

(

disposable income in bulk).

Such

Linking Words

wealth allows them to be, as "happy as Larry".

Howbeit

Suggestion

, it is

persumed

take to be the case or to be true; accept without verification or proof

presumed

that their material wealth oftentimes causes them to

bide

stick to firmly

bind

build

melancholy life. I tend to concur with

this

Linking Words

statement. I will be pleased to discuss with you, why these types of people tend to pay a heavy price for public adulation in the following paragraphs. Being popular means, to be widely known and be in

highlights

Suggestion

the highlights

for your every action. Which means the privacy in their lives is non existent.

For instance

Linking Words

, if Kim Kardashian wears a bikini and steps out on the

beches

an area of sand sloping down to the water of a sea or lake

beaches

miami

a member of the extinct Algonquian people formerly living in northern Indiana and southern Michigan

Miami

to catch some sun, the whole world is going to know about it. Or If

salman

Suggestion

Salman

khan

a title given to rulers or other important people in Asian countries

Khan

heads out for cycling,

picturs

a visual representation (of an object or scene or person or abstraction) produced on a surface

pictures

of him are going to be splashed in

the the

definite article

the

tabloids.

Likewise

Linking Words

, being a star one has to be extremely patient with the public judgements as they are constantly judged.

Moreover

Linking Words

, a celebrity status attracts too many fake friends. Who just for the sake of seeking attention and enjoying the bounties of elite class tries to

befriends

Suggestion

be friends

with them resulting stars to be all alone. They have no sincere shoulder to rest their head on. Being famous seems to have its perks as well: oodles of diehard fans, to get whatever one wishes to have getting special treatments and stuff like that. Anyhow, handling all of

this

Linking Words

: being in

news

Suggestion

the news

for everything, unable to enjoy leisure time, being asked for a

slefie

free from danger or the risk of harm

safe

whenever in public, some celebrities manages to dwell a gleeful life. To illustrate

this

Linking Words

, Kylie Jener and The Beckhams Family are the best examples. Eventually, according to my notion no matter how healthy and fresh celebrities may look on

cammera but

Accept comma addition

camera, but

camera but

behind the curtains they all are normal beings who wants their personal space to be respected

aswell

Suggestion

as well

For

Linking Words

example if

Accept comma addition

example, if

any celebrity gives birth to a newborn they prefer to keep their newborn's identity hidden for some

reasons despite

Accept comma addition

reasons, despite

that media still

stucks

an implement consisting of a length of wood

sticks

stuck

sucks

like a dog's tail just for the sake of

flourushing

very lively and profitable

flourishing

their business and spills the beans.

Submitted by huzamia on Sun May 17 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

360 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
Buying things on the internet, such as groceries, books and air tickets is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping this way outweigh the disadvantages.
Nowadays, In the world bussines is growth verius type. generally many people buy some things on the internet. In this bussines is growth day to day. It has advantages and disadvantages. I will expalin both of view point.
5
band
Some think that too much money has been spent looking after and repairing old buildings, so we knock down old buildings and build modern ones instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
In Taiwan, there are a lot of old buidings situated at the center of the cities. Some people suggest to rebuild the whole society while other try to find solutions to make the old building stronger. I stand for the old buiding should be rebuilt instead of renovate. The new houses can withstand the strong earthquakes and also make the appearence of the cities look better and tidy.
5.5
band
People in all modern societies use drugs, but today’s youth are experimenting with both legal and illegal drugs, and at an increasingly early age. Some sociologists claim that parents and other members of society often set a bad example. Discuss the causes and some effects of widespread drug use by young people in modern day society. Make any recommendations you feel are necessary to help fight youth drug abuse.
The number of people who do drugs both legally and illegally has been increasing, especially with the youth, who have been experimenting with them. I think that the parents and other members of society have set a bad example.
8
band
Write a letter to the editor to give your opinion about a magazine that you purchased. Include Why you bought it What you liked and disliked about it Suggestions for improvement
I am writing this letter to provide constructive feedback about your which I purchased last week.
7
band
A staggering amount of food is wasted every year, both in businesses and household. Why is this happening? What can be done to tackle this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.
People have different opinions on the yearly food waste problem, In this essay, I will discuss the causes of this problem first and then offer some possible solutions to it.

Film stars and music celebrities may earn a great deal of money and live in luxurious surroundings, but many of them lead unhappy lives. Do you agree? To what extent is this the price they pay for being famous?

Fully explain your ideas

Buying things on the internet, such as groceries, books and air tickets is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping this way outweigh the disadvantages.

Some think that too much money has been spent looking after and repairing old buildings, so we knock down old buildings and build modern ones instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Write a letter to the editor to give your opinion about a magazine that you purchased. Include Why you bought it What you liked and disliked about it Suggestions for improvement

A staggering amount of food is wasted every year, both in businesses and household. Why is this happening? What can be done to tackle this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.