One of the most pressing problems facing the world today is overpopulation.What policies do you believe governments should adopt to address the causes and effects of this problem ?
The most pressing problem facing governments around the world.
This
is a major concern in many countries, especially in developing countries. To find a solution to this
crisis, politicians must solve not only momentary problems
but also
long-term causes if they want to save humanity.
As for the decision, the government should be responsible for this
issue.Furthermore
, it is vital that the state provides essential housing and healthcare for all its citizens.
Therefore
, giving sex education is essential for younger youth as they are the next generation to run the world.People think think
that traditional education should be included in the lessons and Remove the redundancy
apply
hence
, we can prevent mass populations.
Moreover
, It is necessary to organize abdominal wounds in which young people spend their free time. For example
, youth clubs or evening classes for teenagers would keep them occupied. In this
way, the internal order of the city would also
improve.
In addition
, Governments around the world should participate in the development of policies aimed at solving this
problem. Countries should start educational programs for their citizens about overpopulation. In addition
, laws should be created and introduced for street peace.
On the other hand
,individuals should also
try to address these problems
. One way is to put pressure on the government to ensure they tackle the problems
by, for instance
, forming action groups to lobby the government and request intervention and adequate funding. They could also
form Neighbourhood Watch areas to try and help reduce the high levels of crime.
To conclude
, overpopulation is one of the biggest problems
of any nation, and it has great consequences.Street silence has many advantages. This
issue should be addressed early so that, future generations should not face the consequences of it.Submitted by marina.parmenova on
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Coherence and Cohesion
The essay lacks a clear logical structure, often jumping from one idea to another without clear connections or transitions. Work on organizing your essay into clear paragraphs, each with a single focus, and use transition phrases to connect ideas smoothly.
Coherence and Cohesion
While an introduction and conclusion are present, they do not clearly state the topic or effectively summarize the main points of the essay. Ensure that your introduction clearly sets the context and outlines the upcoming discussion, and that your conclusion summarizes the points made and restates your position.
Coherence and Cohesion
Support for the main points is weak and often unclear. Strengthen your essay by providing clear explanations, evidence, or examples to support each point you make. Ensure each paragraph contains one central idea that is well supported and explored.
Task Achievement
The response is incomplete as the prompt specifically asks for policies to address the causes and effects of overpopulation, but the essay fails to directly address this. Focus on answering all parts of the question directly and ensure you provide a balanced discussion of both causes and effects.
Task Achievement
Ideas presented in the essay are not developed comprehensively. To improve, expand upon your ideas with detailed explanations and examples that are directly related to overpopulation and the policies that can be adopted to address it.
Task Achievement
The essay lacks relevant and specific examples that are directly tied to the issue of overpopulation and the policies that governments should adopt. Use concrete examples to illustrate your points and demonstrate a clear understanding of the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.