Some people think that physical strength is important for success in sport, while other people think that mental strength is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

First,
let me introduce myself, I am Ainur, and I am from Kyrgyzstan, which is the smallest country in Central Asia. With
this
letter
Add a comma
letter,
show examples
I would like to express my interest in studying
a
Change preposition
for a
show examples
Bachelor’s Degree in
Information
Engineering
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
Hamburg
Correct article usage
the Hamburg
show examples
University of Applied Science. Until today, I used to think that a current level of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technological development is able to solve any problem and bring up a decision. But
this
year being under quarantine
due to
COVID-19 most people have realized that there are still a
lot
of holes and things that we have to do in
near
Correct article usage
the near
show examples
future. Just thinking that the century of
information
technologies brought us huge opportunities is not valid, we are still vulnerable. In
this
case
Add a comma
case,
show examples
I have a big desire to be part of a progressive generation with ideas and solutions
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
making
this
world
better. But we should have a tool. My tool is programming and
software-development
Correct your spelling
software development
show examples
. But why did I choose the
information
engineering?
Firstly
, I should mention that almost 2 years ago I totally changed my career field and
come
Wrong verb form
came
show examples
from state service to the
world
of programming. I am very happy to be part of
this
world
,
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apply
show examples
because I can see my achievements and mistakes immediately after doing a project, which always
motivate
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motivates
show examples
me. I am happy when the employees feel the ease of automation of work processes that previously took a
lot
of time and effort.
For example
,
currently
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currently,
show examples
I am working on
project
Add an article
a project
the project
show examples
in
joint
Add an article
a joint
show examples
stock company in
telecom
Correct article usage
the telecom
show examples
company “Kyrgyz Telekom”, where I have a small team of
software-developers
Correct your spelling
software developers
show examples
and spent a
lot
of time and effort
doing
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
automation the main processes of
this
company.
Secondly
, I am highly interested in continuing my career in
Information
Engineering,
however
, I still need a
lot
of
skills
, practice and
international
Correct article usage
an international
show examples
approach
in
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to
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learning programming. For that reason, I found
this
bachelor
program
in HAW Hamburg as the most suitable
program
due to
the following reasons: 1.Germany's high achievement in technology among other European countries 2.As a NON-EU citizen, I feel
such
international
Correct article usage
an international
show examples
environment makes the study process more interesting and
process
Correct article usage
the process
show examples
of adaptation easier. 3. The mix of
information
technology, electrical engineering and computer science, which are covered in the BSc
Information
Engineering
program
, provides us with a solid basis for working with these modern technologies,
as well as
with future technologies. 4.
This
program
covers a number of topics that interest me the most,
such
as Mathematics, Electrical Engineering, Microcontrollers, etc. As a future
Add a comma
software-engineer,
show examples
software-engineer
Correct your spelling
software engineer
show examples
I must be an expert in these fields. I am certain that the numerous traineeships and workshops I will take part in during my studies will help me to gain
necessary
Correct article usage
the necessary
show examples
knowledge and
skills
.
Finally
, studying at HAW will significantly improve my English
skills
. As one
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
most important languages in the
world
, English will help me to form new connections and expand my social network to a global level. In conclusion, with all the
information
listed above, I am in search of bringing my career to the next level. The subjects offered in
this
program
are specifically in line with my professional goals.
Additionally
, the mandatory study abroad semester provides a great grounding in which to
further
experience divergent cultures and exchange knowledge. I am certain that the knowledge and
skills
learned from my professional experience, university, and extracurricular activities would make me a valuable addition to the BSc
Information
Engineering
program
offered at HAW Hamburg.
Submitted by kids.mara.office on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • physical conditioning
  • athleticism
  • physical training
  • muscle strength
  • mental resilience
  • psychological preparedness
  • mental toughness
  • confidence
  • precision
  • focus
  • mental strategies
  • mental fortitude
  • brute strength
What to do next:
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