some people say that what children watch influences their behavior. Others believe that amount of time they spend on television influences their behavior most

#people #children #influences #behavior #amount #time #television

While it is true that watchings

affects children, it is hard to determine it is whether the length of watching time or the content of programs has more effects on youngsters.

Although

I believe that the time spent watching

has negative impacts on young people, I think the content of programs has more marked influences on them. On one hand, the consequences of watching

for a long period of time are deleterious.

First

, The more children are exposed to

programs, the more likely it is for them to become addicted to them. They might become more

overeliant

extremely poisonous or injurious; producing venom

virulent

for entertainment, which results in a sedentary lifestyle.

Thefore

Suggestion

Therefore

, they are likely to have health risks,

such

as heart attack and

diobety

a polygenic disease characterized by abnormally high glucose levels in the blood; any of several metabolic disorders marked by excessive urination and persistent thirst

diabetes

Submitted by nphai88 on Mon May 18 2020

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

2 paragraphs

125 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

influence
behavior
television
content
violent
inappropriate
aggressive
attitudes
imitate
actions
language
amount
time
screen time
sedentary
obesity
academic performance
exposure
social interactions
creativity
monitor
control
caregivers
parents
limit
engage
activities
opinion

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some people say that what children watch influences their behavior. Others believe that amount of time they spend on television influences their behavior most

Include an introduction and conclusion

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Since most information about culture and history can be found on the internet, museums are not needed anymore. To what extent do you agree !