All over the world societies are facing a growing problem with obesity. This problem effects both children and adults. What are the reason for this rise in obesity. How could it be tackled?

In these days, In many countries, the number of people who became overweight has increased and their health condition and fitness level are declining both children and adults. Worldwide publics are
encounter
Suggestion
encountering
an
escolating
increase in extent or intensity
escalating
issue about
adiposity
, adults
also
face children.
This
essay will look at the reason for
this
and
porpose
make a proposal, declare a plan for something
propose
some solutions. One of the main causes of the problem is that obesity leads to serious disease and both adults and children can get
these illness
Suggestion
these illnesses
this illness
.
For instance
, many countries currently suffer from
this
problem because,
obeseness
a commercial or industrial enterprise and the people who constitute it
business
leads to diseases like diabetes, high blood pressure and heart attacks. The solution is
for
Suggestion
to
this
problem, people who are faced with
this
sickness should eat right, exercise regularly and make the regimen of the day and sleep. Another people is that many overweight people are shy of their appearance and they have serious psychological problems.
For example
, children in their teens are very embarrassed by their appearance; they, like other children, cannot feel at ease and play with everyone, because they quickly get tired due to being
preponderance
Suggestion
preponderantly
, sometimes even mimic them. To tackle
this
issue you need together with a psychologist and playing sports, parents
also
need to support them and increase their self-esteem To conclude,
although
many countries are now a
days
Suggestion
day
falling prey to unhealthy
diet but
Accept comma addition
diet, but
we can fight and defeat
this
menace with strong will power and taking some preventive actions as described above. I think everyone should eat right and exercise because it’s good for everyone
Submitted by matkarim.quldoshev on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
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