Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

#people #work #hours #time #leisure #activities #situation

The entire human race is getting busy

Suggestion

with

every passing day. Since everyone has adopted working long hours, it is natural to miss other joys of

life

This

situation has certain benefits in terms of making

fortunes

Accept comma addition

fortunes, however

however

the downside of the same is substantial. In terms of advantages, it is evident that working long hours

proves

Suggestion

prove

to be helpful in developing a career. Taking more

work

and finishing it despite stringent timelines is always appreciated in

corporate sector

Suggestion

the corporate sector

and leads to early promotions. Those who start up new companies

work

more than needed to make their business successful and earn a quick competitive advantage. Take Ratan Tata

for example

. He is known as a workaholic and has overworked to take his automobile to the top. The advantage of going an extra mile in terms

work

is not debatable. Let’s turn to the other side of the argument.

Work

may have its own advantages;

however

, it simply fades away all other important aspects of

life

. People who tend to spend more time at

work

get lesser time to spend with family resulting weak family bonding.

Moreover

such

people hardly take out time

Suggestion

for

physical exercise or any sport activity resulting bad physical health and shorter

life

expectancy. Research suggests that people who are more focused on

work ignoring

Suggestion

work, ignoring

everything else tend to diagnose with diseases like diabetes, high cholesterol and blood pressure. Take Steve

Jobs

Accept comma addition

Jobs, for

for example

. His entire

life

is a success story, but he could not live long enough to enjoy what he earned. We opt for more

work

to earn

fortune

Suggestion

a fortune

so that we can enjoy all aspects of

life

;

however

, in reality our chosen

work

vanishes away everything else from

life

. To conclude, I would say that working long hours brings tangible benefits,

however

the associated disadvantages always supersede.

Submitted by rakeshkk2 on Mon May 25 2020

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

303 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

work-life balance
mental well-being
burnout
stress relief
productivity
economic growth
career progression
skill enhancement
quality time
financial security
leisure activities
physical health
personal relationships
stress-related illnesses

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Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Crimes and other kinds of information on the television and newspaper have bad consequences. This kind of information to be restricted to be shown in media. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

Some people say the professional workers such as, doctors, nurses and teachers, who make greater contribution to the society, should be paid more than those people in the field of sports and entertainment. To what extent do you agree and disagree?.

many musseums charge for admission while others are free. do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweight the disadvantages?

The plans below show the layout of a university's sports centre now, and how it will look after redevelopment. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.