Some people think that parents have a powerful influence in child’s life, while the influence from outside the home plays a bigger part of child’s development. To what extent do you agree or disagree

More and more people reckon that parents play an important rule in

educate

Suggestion

educating

their children while a huge number of individuals believe in the effect of external

influencers

a power to affect persons or events especially power based on prestige etc

influences

on kids, which are more greater. I partly agree with

this

Linking Words

assertion cause it depends on the way that children can be

access

Suggestion

accessed

in their grow up time. On the one hand, it is

obviously

Suggestion

obvious

to observe that

children

Suggestion

the children

spent numerous of their time with parents. In the period of development, they tend to imitate what is happening around them. All of their parent habits, from schedule to daily routines can determine to the character of children in the future. To be more specific, if the

behavior

manner of acting or controlling yourself

behaviour

of parents

are

Suggestion

is

polite and orderly, their children will turn out to be organized greatly.

By

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contrast educated

Accept comma addition

contrast, educated

by irresponsible parents is the major reason make kids do not have any essential skills.

For example

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, in Vietnam, people assert that one’s kid personality is like two peas in a pod with he/

she

of a female

her

parent.

On the other hand

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, with the growing of internet and electric devices, children tend to have more opportunity to approach many influences. They are KOL, author, artist, coach or even a normal

person but

Accept comma addition

person, but

have a great impact on children, especially teenagers. For

instances

Suggestion

instance

,

instead

Linking Words

of using nylon bag – a bad habit of Vietnamese traditional. Nowadays,

young generation

Suggestion

the younger generation

younger generation

always bring

Suggestion

always brings

their own tote bags which can be

reuse

Suggestion

reused

easily.

That is

Linking Words

a consequence of many common individuals, who are using their

famous

Suggestion

fame

on social media to spread protecting environment actions. To

conclucle

decide by reasoning; draw or come to a conclusion

conclude

, in modern life, both of parents and outside

influencers

a power to affect persons or events especially power based on prestige etc

influences

have the

banlance

a state of equilibrium

balance

effect in the process of shaping a child’s personality.