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Band 5

Writing essay: Is money the most important thing in life?

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Money
Use synonyms
 has appeared in a thousand years and it still has played an important role in people’s
life
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.
However
Linking Words
, it is argued that
money
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 is the most crucial thing while the other people believe that health and
happiness
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 bring a greater meaning in human’s
life
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.
To begin
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 with ,
i
Accept space
,
t is often argued that having
money
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 enables people to exert influence over other people. Wealthy businessmen,
for example
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, are often the most highly respected me
mber o
Suggestion
members
f society, and business tycoons are often consulted by world leaders, who
then
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 make policies that affect the whole population, as a consequence,
money
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 an be seen as the single most important factor in daily
life
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.
Secondly
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, from the point of view of the individual,
money
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 is vital for survival. Western society is structured in
such
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 a way that, without
money
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, people are deprived of the means to obtain proper nutrition and he
althcare.
Suggestion
health care
Furthermore
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, in some cases where state benefits are inadequate ,
th
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,
e inability to pay heating bills and indeed become a matter of
life
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 and death.
This
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 is clearly illustrated by the fact that, according to Social Services ,
t
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,
he majority of death due to hypothermia each winter occurs among low-income groups.
On the other hand
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 ,
m
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,
any people claim that one of the factors in which is undoubtedly of greater important than
money
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 is health. What is more,
money
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 is of little consolation to those who are suffering from health problems. Despite the fact that
money
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 can pay for the best medical care available,
this
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 is no guarantee of a longer
life
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.
In addition
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 ,
m
Accept space
,
ost people would agree that personal
happiness
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 easily outweighs
mo
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ney i
Suggestion
the money
n importance. Even if an individual is extremely rich ,
Accept space
,
this
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 dose no
t necessarily lead t
Suggestion
doesn't necessarily lead
o
happiness
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 .
I
Accept space
.
n some cases ,
t
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,
he contrary is true ,
t
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,
he contrary is true and vast wealth brings with it a range of problems and in
securities.
the state of being subject to danger or injury
insecurities
Genuine
happiness
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 cannot be bought and is usually independent of financial status. To sum up, though for some people
money
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 is the best thing, a number of people completely disagree.
Money
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 is an indispensable th
ing but i
Accept comma addition
thing, but
t is not the most vital things in our
life
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.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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