Some people believe that money is the best gift for teenagers while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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The aptness of giving cash as a present to young people has always been the controversial issue for years. Some people claim that having funds as the gift is the relatively practical for adolescents, while others oppose with

this

Linking Words

assertion. The idea of both sides with my own opinion will be

further

Linking Words

discussed and elaborated in the following essay.

To begin

Linking Words

with, it is a great financial literacy tool for youngsters to understand the core value of money.

For instance

Linking Words

, awarding minors with banknotes when they

acheive

to gain with effort

achieve

the aim of school grades that enables parents to

estabilish

set up or found

establish

the connection between pay and work before they engage in their career. It is a vital lesson for them to acknowledge that having fortune

somtimes

on certain occasions or in certain cases but not always

sometimes

involving in the immense efforts and dedications.

As a result

Linking Words

, a sense of responsibility can be cultivated by managing their personal finance as early as possible.

By contrast

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, those stand on the opposite of the view above may counter that it may mislead juveniles to consider the wealth as the best reward ever. To illustrate, many adults prefer to link allowance and houseworks together.

However

Linking Words

, without any compensations, children will lose their incentive of doing chores.

This

Linking Words

might foster the misunderstanding of the significance of being a part of

family

Suggestion

a family

the family

which means cleaning the house should not be an assignment,

conversely

Linking Words

, it is obligated for every family member.

Therefore

Linking Words

misuseing

not able to be found

missing

money as prize can cause kids to have

failure

Suggestion

failed

Suggestion

recognizing the authentic worth of things; worst of all, growing up as a materialistic person. In conclusion, the two sides of statement are concerning the effect of providing youths cash

Suggestion

present that both have strong supporters.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, after analysing both sides, it is crystal clear to me that offering money as premium helps teenagers to have familiarity with monetary management as well as promotes the fiscal

indenpendency

freedom from control or influence of another or others

independence

as becoming a grown person.

p282734Wed May 27 2020

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

315 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

financial responsibility
budget
save
informed spending decisions
personal preferences
practical and efficient
unwanted or inappropriate gifts
impersonal
emotional value
thoughtfulness
personal consideration
wise financial decisions
frivolously
lasting memories and experiences
educational courses
hobby-related equipment
long-lasting positive impact
fostering interests and skills

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